Just in case the children locked up in the basement need the extra nourishment.
When you work for the Monument Association you automatically get your shaft erected.
It's resurrected after 3 days, ladies. Be patient.
That's EXACTLY what a drug dealer would say.
Unless they're so smart they wear it ironically.
Someone took carpet munching to a literal level.
When you wish upon a star...
The waiter used air quotes for tonight's special, "Fresh Chilean Sea Bass."
Where dreams go to die.
Unless you're Arnold Schwarzenegger in "Junior" of course.
"Ohh, I thought underlined words meant sarcasm. My baaaahd." - Badass Goat
She must have double-booked that night.
That explains the consistency of the milkshakes.
Now to go back in time and change the speed limit to 88.
How rude. Don't they know the word "Mexican" is offensive to Mexicans?
"Dude, you're running low on gas too. Bonerz."
They have a strictly enforced "sleep on your stomach" rule.
This sign brought to you by Captain Obvious.
So wait, does this mean that zebras are only half normal?
It was just in the window of an empty store at the mall. I don't know why..
It's a messy scene on that corner.
They don't even live in an apartment. Houses are separated by miles in rural upstate New York.
Unless Bottle is a kid's name. Then it's discouraged.
It's against company policy to leave packages unattended, so he gave it an up-vote out of sympathy.