Snow is a pure, magical substance that you can throw, pee on, and shape into penises, igloos, and penis igloos. That's what the song "Winter Wonderland" is actually about.

    It's a long offseason for some fans.
    It must be laundry day.
    Good! Fine!
    Christmas isn't the only thing coming early this year.
    Where did we put that gigantic snow bottle opener?
    Just a hallway in the greatest snow fort of all time.
    'Bitching' or 'BITCHIN'!!'
    "Yes, it works."

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