Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
Mom, stop taking pictures, you're ruining my first arrest.
The ole' free haircut trick.
Everyone's got at least a few pictures they hope their parents never see.
"They didn't even notice the camera flash..."
Check it out dude, I taught myself how to juggle meat cleavers. Watch.
"We filled up 50 bottles of piss during the first half of our first semester at college and kept them in our room. We were too lazy to walk down the hall and unlock the bathroom doors which are kept locked. We were going for 100 but the smell became too b
Gas, food, and bong hits.
When the bouncer looks down, get your thumb ready. Then when he looks up again, flash him that smile. You're in.
Texas Tech. may have beaten Texas A&M last week, but A&M-alum-with-a-mustache got the last laugh.
Rub-a-dub-dub some dude in a tub.
"Free Picture Day at the mall."
One friend request you almost have to approve. Just look at him.
"This is my nephew's hand before we had his extra thumb removed, when he was 1 1/2 years old."
Are you sure you're okay to drive home ma'am?
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We like you. Do you like us too?
Don't ask me again.