LOLShakespeare

Your Professor, Translated

Simply roll your mouse over the text to reveal its true meaning! Attendance is 1/3 of your grade. Attendance is 0/3 of your grade. The textbook makes a useful reference tool. The textbook makes a useful paperweight. I recently got...

Chronicles of a Student-Teacher Affair

Increasingly Obvious Attempts to Draw Attention to the Old Lady in My American Literature Class

“Although Hemingway’s In Our Time is now regarded as one of the seminal American expatriate works of the era, at the time of its release it was met with mixed critical review. It’s unfortunate that none of us has the capability...

A Classics Major Gets Laid...Maybe

Come hither, yonder wench and allow me tell you the tale of horny Aphrodite – the goddess who never wanted for attention!  Hers is a tale of tawdry torment, of bounteous lust, of skin-slapping without end!  ‘Tis the tale of the night...

Movies for Majors

When I first saw "Jurassic Park" in 1993, I left the theater convinced I would someday dig up dinosaur bones -- until I learned such a career would not include Laura Dern wearing khaki shorts and a tank top. However, Spielberg's film still taught...

How To Impress A Naive Academic

An Academic Thesis is always impressive, mostly because of it's title. You can impress naive grad students into thinking you are an intellectual just by explaining everything you're into, in a highly exalted way. I'm into Rap music, so I always...

Syllabus From A Very Insecure Professor

We've all had a "cool" professor...

Your Textbooks Rewritten As Erotic Novels

PHILOSOPHY: Nietzsche thrusted deeper and deeper between the supple legs of Simone de Beauvoir, yelling “Who’s your ubermensch?” Simone lost...