Stupid dog - you're not underwater, you don't need goggles.

Dude, moon him!

He's asking for money and he's not even playing the guitar or anything?

Hollywood, here I come.

I'm so lonely.

You said you would be out of bed by noon!

Can you help me hit this? It seems I don't have fingers.

How did you know my only weakness was a dog in sunglasses?

When you're a Jet, you're a Jet all the way from your first cigarette to your last dyin' day.

"Not only did this jackass put sunglasses on his dog, but he tatooed a picture of his dog wearing sunglasses on his leg."

Where cool dogs hang out.

They should make dog sunglasses. I bet that would freak the dogs out.

I would not start with this guy.

I asked for my reading glasses, not my driving glasses.

Once, when a Lion was asleep, a little Mouse began running up and down upon him. This soon wakened the Lion, who placed his huge paw upon him, and opened his big jaws to swallow him. "Pardon, O King," cried the little Mouse, "forgive me this time, I shall never forget it! I may be able to return the favor one of these day?" The Lion was so tickled at the idea of the Mouse being able to help him that he lifted up his paw and let him go.

Bad to the bone. Interesting, apparently we let a third grader write this caption.

I drink to have fun, not because like I have to or anything.

More dogs in sunglasses!

We started drinking at 3 in the afternoon and this BITCH was passed out by 5:30.

I feel the need... the need to sniff other dog's asses.