CollegeHumor: Lies Stuff This Month http://www.collegehumor.com http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1927663 The old "painting a donkey to look like a zebra" trick, ay? I give him 24 hours before the toxic paint seeps through his hide and slowly poisons him. Thu, 19 Nov 2009 08:25:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1927663 The old "painting a donkey to look like a zebra" trick, ay? I give him 24 hours before the toxic paint seeps through his hide and slowly poisons him. nonadult comedy The old "painting a donkey to look like a zebra" trick, ay? I give him 24 hours before the toxic paint seeps through his hide and slowly poisons him. zebra, donkey, lies, bodypaint, zoo, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1927663"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/a/collegehumor.7ce4939ba8283423b3ae145a916889e3.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 9 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1925795 It's the most magical donation box ever kids! Fri, 06 Nov 2009 16:48:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1925795 It's the most magical donation box ever kids! nonadult comedy It's the most magical donation box ever kids! lies, education, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1925795"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/0/c/collegehumor.25900d006307738169aef77c37942dfc.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:626656">theslowkid</a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 4 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1921903 Coolest Priest Ever? Wed, 14 Oct 2009 13:51:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1921903 Coolest Priest Ever? nonadult comedy Coolest Priest Ever? dinosaur, tattoo, religion, lies, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1921903"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/f/a/collegehumor.8633430feb0113804493015a05ab8006.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 40 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1921548 They thought of everything except cup holders. Mon, 12 Oct 2009 20:55:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1921548 They thought of everything except cup holders. nonadult comedy They thought of everything except cup holders. car, drive through, fast food, fake, lies, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1921548"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/7/2/collegehumor.c295c2e76b6d2253641bd4a2eeae7dcb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 86 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1919301 It's time to peel off the stickers... and put them on your grandparents. Fri, 04 Sep 2009 02:06:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1919301 It's time to peel off the stickers... and put them on your grandparents. nonadult comedy It's time to peel off the stickers... and put them on your grandparents. obsolete, computer, lies, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1919301"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/9/7/collegehumor.688484f9398f014574fc640731d7ae91.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 14 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> <![CDATA[That's why I never use common sense]]> http://www.collegehumor.com/hotlink:213187 Wed, 15 Apr 2009 08:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1812539 Follow up question, what is smiling? Wed, 23 Apr 2008 14:10:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1812539 Follow up question, what is smiling? nonadult comedy Follow up question, what is smiling? lies, smile, headline, Mike Ditka, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1812539"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/f/4/collegehumor.0272f08f1ab94a7be44922642aa025b2.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:521714">BARNES</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:85"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 64 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1792173 Applebee's is one of the finest restaurants that uses plastic squeeze bottles. Thu, 06 Dec 2007 19:55:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1792173 Applebee's is one of the finest restaurants that uses plastic squeeze bottles. nonadult comedy Applebee's is one of the finest restaurants that uses plastic squeeze bottles. heinz, applebee's, lies, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1792173"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/8/5/collegehumor.0205f4787d1c15a43f6e34e5ac3f23ff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1346702">Alex</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:394"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 18 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1744569 Barely Believable Lies Wed, 14 Nov 2007 18:10:32 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1744569 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
  • I was an extra in "Little Nicky" but they cut my scene out last minute. Adam Sandler is exactly how I imagined though.
  • I was actually on an unaired episode of Nick Cannon's "Wild 'N Out".
  • My family was on "Double Dare" back in the day. We had the tape at home but I think my dad recorded over it by accident. We made it as far as the obstacle course but my little brother lost it for us at the giant peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:326"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/c/9/collegehumor.45397a4c6c8241522ef776b95348cf0f.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-11-14 18:10:32 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:326">Jeff Rosenberg</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1236"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 48 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1780542 It's National Opposite Day. Thu, 18 Oct 2007 09:52:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1780542 It's National Opposite Day. nonadult comedy It's National Opposite Day. lies, water, sign, highway, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1780542"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/d/collegehumor.ced26271105df4431d38877d6fbf9f66.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 75 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1778009 "Someone is lying." Tue, 02 Oct 2007 08:25:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1778009 "Someone is lying." nonadult comedy "Someone is lying." no sign, faucet, lies, prohibit, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1778009"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/f/0/collegehumor.be486d8faafd3cb52d0dcd9021885a63.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:7935">Shade</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:117"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 77 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1765270 You sir, are a LIAR! Sun, 01 Jul 2007 13:18:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1765270 You sir, are a LIAR! nonadult comedy You sir, are a LIAR! Signs, Fence, Lies, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1765270"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/6/b/collegehumor.1e3ee0f6b8f8ac930aae4e9bbcd4d1bd.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:108553">Alex</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1351"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 117 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1764802 He's only disguised as Superman to catch The Penguin off guard. Wed, 27 Jun 2007 12:37:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1764802 He's only disguised as Superman to catch The Penguin off guard. nonadult comedy He's only disguised as Superman to catch The Penguin off guard. superman, batman, lies, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1764802"><img src="http://6.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/6/d/collegehumor.1c3129969f7a9037af72853daa082c2f.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:112416">Craig F.</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:930"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 69 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1760921 Note the fine print, "words in red mean opposite." Sat, 26 May 2007 18:57:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1760921 Note the fine print, "words in red mean opposite." nonadult comedy Note the fine print, "words in red mean opposite." lies, dollar store, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1760921"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/7/7/collegehumor.21225007499508893cbaf3b79ece63f7.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 45 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1747875 The biggest lie is that she exists at all. Sat, 24 Mar 2007 22:59:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1747875 The biggest lie is that she exists at all. nonadult comedy The biggest lie is that she exists at all. lies, spam, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1747875"><img src="http://6.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/4/8/collegehumor.205f66e422199a6255cae598d732fab6.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1568942">Josh</a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 8 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1722259 How To Impress A Naive Academic Wed, 07 Mar 2007 12:42:34 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1722259 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> An Academic Thesis is always impressive, mostly because of it's title. You can impress naive grad students into thinking you are an intellectual just by explaining everything you're into, in a highly exalted way. I'm into Rap music, so I always tell unsuspecting doctoral candidates that I wrote my dissertation on "Third World Appropriations of Hip Hop Culture as a means for Social Revolution."

If your title is written to a suitable level of grandiloquence they won't ask further questions. I've written some essay titles based on topics you might be interested in. Feel free to use these while flirting with your TA.


If you are into Keg Stands...
 
Going Vertical: An Inquiry into how the Inverted Imbibing of Carbonated Alcoholic Beverages is Beneficial Towards the Participant's Composition

If you are into Pizza...

A Contemporary Manna:  The Food of Life

If you are into Date Rape...

Does No, Really Mean No?: Redefining Concepts of Consensus

If you are into Fart Jokes...

A Lethal Wind: An Exploration into the Jocularity of Flatuence

If you are into Chiefings/Shamings...

Epidermic Cartography: The Mapping of One's Evening as Described by the Markings on Their Skin.

Remember the three rules of an impressive essay title:  Long words, Long sentences, Disregard grammar advice from Word.

View Article
]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:405465"><img src="http://8.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/8/collegehumor.3bb700fe616742b46dae22381d3e2a6f.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-03-07 12:42:34 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:405465">Joshua Heller</a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 25 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1720708 "From Pieces to Weight" Excerpts I Doubt 50 Cent Actually Wrote Fri, 23 Feb 2007 15:44:58 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1720708 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> I just finished reading 50 Cent's memoir, From Pieces to Weight, which recounts his life as a crack dealer and upstart rapper. The ghostwriter makes a valiant effort to replicate 50's voice throughout, with passages such as Seeing my grandfather cry was like watching one of those horror movies where a statue or a painting comes to life. I was like, that's not supposed to happen sounding as if 50 himself were actually the person typing it. Other times, not so much. I have a really hard time believing that Fiddy wrote the following passages:

Childhood on the mean streets of Queens wasn't like those perfect happy families you see on TV. Shit was arduous.

I hated school. I realized early on the only math I needed was calculating how to cut my coke. (You use the quadratic formula.)

Mom was dead. Oy vey.

Life in the hood. If a drive-by doesn't kill you, the ennui will.

I used to roll my eyes when Grandaddy would recount his favorite sonnets from memory. Only now do I realize it's where I picked up the meter employed on my Ja Rule dis track "I Smell Pussy."

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:539238"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/c/4/collegehumor.19c29f6cbe90a962b0fb5b240378dd2b.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-02-23 15:44:58 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:539238">Jarrett Grode</a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 49 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1730474 Let's test out your theory. I really like your tattoo. Mon, 18 Dec 2006 20:48:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1730474 Let's test out your theory. I really like your tattoo. nonadult comedy Let's test out your theory. I really like your tattoo. tattoo, lies, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1730474"><img src="http://8.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/0/d/collegehumor.7df2b40013c10ffbf028f8bd1911f717.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 15 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1730157 Despite the RA's report, I also believe you and your roommates when you told me about your glass slide whistle covered in Phish stickers. Wed, 13 Dec 2006 11:04:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1730157 Despite the RA's report, I also believe you and your roommates when you told me about your glass slide whistle covered in Phish stickers. nonadult comedy Despite the RA's report, I also believe you and your roommates when you told me about your glass slide whistle covered in Phish stickers. beer bong, sneaky, goldfish, lies, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1730157"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/2/collegehumor.e88791ea5738335155ce7ac285d33640.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:33784">Trevor</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:169"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 463 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1725102 EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IS WRONG Wed, 22 Nov 2006 19:55:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1725102 EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IS WRONG nonadult comedy EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IS WRONG door, lies, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1725102"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/d/b/collegehumor.6476aa4dd0a3baf5301cf46b11fa9571.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:54421">Wubs</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:23"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 270 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />