Anyway, Kimber and MLMD got tattoos of each other's faces on their biceps, so it's especially awesome of her to be withholding sex. I guess since Julia's not around, every other female character has to act thrice as cunty to make up for it. Sean...
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5 Comments
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3 months ago
Teddy Rose tries to wake Sean up, but he's unresponsive. Shecalls Christian into the room and he's like, "OMG did the Carver get himagain?" and she's like, "No, I think he took some evil sleeping pills that Igave him," and Christian's like, "It's...
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14 Comments
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4 months ago
Sean wakes up in the middle of the night and takes the sleeping pills Teddy gave him. He also notices that he's wearing a wedding ring. Later, Teddy tries to wake him up, and he appears to be dead. Heartbroken, Teddy is all, "Eyes, look your last!...
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10 Comments
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4 months ago
Fun fact: Bram Stoker was a huge fan of Walt Whitman (either he or Lorca was the president of the Walt Whitman Fan Club), which in the 19th century was a euphanism for saying someone was gay, like saying a woman was a k.d. Lang fan in the 1990s....
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10 Comments
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1 year ago
Man, I know that Nip/Tuck has their whole thing with naming episodes after characters getting surgery, but they really could have had a heydey with this one. Of the many I considered while watching the show (The Replacements; Die, Mommie, Die), I...
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13 Comments
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1 year ago
I'm not sure if anybody caught Christopher Titus' new Comedy Central special this weekend, but it was really good. He's one of the better storytellers working today, along with David Sedaris and Mike Rowe. In the past Titus has talked a lot about...
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22 Comments
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1 year ago
Wow, the titular character has almost as many double-letters in his name as Maggie Gyllenhaal(l). Also wow, those "Previously On"s were positively interminable. Apparently Manny Skerritt's dick is sooo huuuuge that he desires to have its size...
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11 Comments
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1 year ago
If I had to choose one thing I wanted an episode of a TV show to use for a theme, it would have to be Sluts. If I could choose two things, they would be Sluts and Father-Son relationships. I lucked the fuck out tonight, let me tell you. The show...
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9 Comments
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1 year ago
Because of technical difficulties involving my DVR being an asshole, I didn't get to watch the show until late tonight, and am therefore live blogging it. Usually I go back through and add shit to my notes, but I don't have time for that tonight,...
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17 Comments
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1 year ago
They don't show Sean standing up in the previously on's, so if you missed that last week, too bad for you. Or maybe they figure that news of Sean's fake paralysis was just all over the blogosphere, if they use words like blogosphere, rendering any...
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10 Comments
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1 year ago
Previously on nip/tuck: Eden shot Julia in the head, resulting in the classic TV coma-amnesia one-two punch. When she woke up, Sean told Julia that they were still married, Christian and Annie got into a car accident beacuse of paparazzi, and then...
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24 Comments
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1 year ago
Oh man, you guys. It's the end of the road. The VERY LAST NIP/TUCK OF THE SEASON. WHAT WILL HAPPEN???!!??!!??!?!1/!??!?Stiffler's mom had surgery in Thailand or someplace Asian and poor because she was worried about the paparazzi in California....
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24 Comments
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2 years ago
Oh man, this was the best episode of Star Wars ever! H&S gets a bad review in a magazine. Specifically, the critic thinks that Sean isn't necessarily a bad actor, just the most boring-looking person in the world. At least that critic has his...
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28 Comments
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2 years ago
Happy Mardi Gras everyone! If you were paying attention to the clues last week, you learned that I used to go to school in New Orleans, so Mardi Gras used to be a very special, very drunken time for me. Example from 1996:I had nightmares from this...
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20 Comments
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2 years ago
When I used to go to Tulane, my boyfriend and I would watch Nip/Tuck together every week. If an episode was really good, like if 8 people died or Quentin had no penis or Matt had to cut off a pre-op tranny's penis, afterwards we would...
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27 Comments
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2 years ago
The episode was pretty awesome. Not gonna lie, I've been a little bit buzzed for the past, like, four hours, but I can still objectively determine that it was a lot better than last week's episode. We open on a tiny little old lady (Magda) and her...
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10 Comments
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2 years ago
This is just going to be the white elephant in the room of my recap if I don't say it straight away, so here goes: Matt is going to be appearing in a film about a vagina that has teeth. That has to be the best thing I've heard so far this year,...
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6 Comments
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2 years ago
"Total Eclipse of the Heart" starts to play as Julia appears on Christian's doorstep. She says basically the same words that Kimber said earlier, about needing him to stick his ding-dong in her hoo-ha, and I'm sure the disparity in the sincerity...
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26 Comments
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2 years ago
I'm really not sure how I feel about this week's episode. On the one hand, it was stupid as hell for the first 45 minutes. On the other hand, those 45 minutes were supposed to be an episode of a reality show, so if it weren't stupid, that would be...
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31 Comments
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2 years ago
Dear Nip/Tuck,Here is my Christmas List: 1) More abundant and gory surgeries. 2) Sex that is not with fat white ladies. 3) Less footage of Sean's ass. 4) Xanax with two free refills. I have a feeling I'm not going to get any of those, but here's...
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25 Comments
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2 years ago 
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