The Onion: Steven Tyler Laid Off From Aerosmith As Band's Jobless Rate Hits 20%
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The Onion: Entertainment Scientists Warn Miley Cyrus Will Be Depleted by 2013
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The Onion: "Why Do All These Homosexuals Keep Sucking My Cock?"
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The Onion: Supreme Court Rules Death Penalty Is 'Totally Badass'
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The Onion: Fantasy Baseball Owner Rips Team In Media
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The Onion: High School Tony Awards Honor Nation's Biggest Drama Club Nerds
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The Onion: 'Warcraft' Sequel Lets Gamers Play A Character Playing 'Warcraft'
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The Onion: Pau Gasol Googles 'Lakers + Celtics + Rivalry'
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Nike Signs Big Brown To $90 Million Horseshoe Contract
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The Onion: "New Roommate Hopes Five-Hour F*ckfest Didn't Keep You Up"
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The Onion: Historic ‘Blockbuster’ Store Offers Glimpse Of How Movies Were Rented In The Past
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The Onion, Sports: One NHL goalie has actually taken up residence in his net.
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From The Onion: Area Man Honored To Be One Who Added Death Date To Heath Ledger's Wikipedia Page
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The Onion reports on a recent controversy in the Thai sport of Takraw.
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Another great edition of the Onion's Atlas Of The Planet, this time featuring facts about Columbia. Most of the facts are cocaine-related.
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The Onion examines how one former Gladiator reacts to the reincarnation of the franchise.
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Onion News Network correspondents discuss Paramount's decision to adapt the wildly popular 'Iron Man' trailer into a full-length film.rn
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