New Sim On the Block

Bill: Hello, new acquaintance.Dave: Hey, neighbor, can I ask you something?Bill: City hall. Rain cloud. Dollar sign.Dave: Um, yeah. Listen, I really need a friend. My boss says I can't get promoted until I get one and learn something about...

If Videogame Titles Were Literal

Co-written and co-Illustrated by Andrew B. and Conor McKeon.  For more videogame humor, please check out GamerPaper.com! 

Videogame University

Illustrated by Mr. Caldwell Tanner.

The Legend of the Legend of Zelda

Link: Huzzah! I've conquered innumerable foes, overcome impossible odds, trekked far and wide, come to the brink of death, defeated the unstoppable Ganon, and saved the fair princess!Zelda: Yes, and for years to come, people will speak of the...

Banjo's Backpack

Kazooie: Banjo, wake up! Grunty kidnapped your sister!Banjo: Oh no, we have to save her! Quick, get in my backpack.Kazooie: The fastest way to get..... wait, what?Banjo: What?Kazooie: Did you just tell me to get in your backpack?Banjo: Well yeah,...

King Koopa Becomes Bowser

Koopa Troopa, Goomba, Shy Guy and Bob-omb sit in a pub. Troopa: How much longer they got you walking between those two pipes?Goomba: Two more weeks on the job, then I'm retired. I can't wait to see my kids again.King Koopa enters.King Koopa:...

Press Cuttings - Giant Killer

World of Warcraft Invades Second Life

Thanks to Caldwell Tanner for the amazing illustrations!

Sega Gives Xbox Some Advice

Sega: What's the matter with you Xbox?Xbox: Oh, hi Sega. I'm just feeling down because Wii has sold like a billion units lately.Sega: That goddam Nintendo. Did I ever tell you how I had the first CD drive?Xbox: Yes, like a million times.Sega:...

Why They Cancelled America's Army

The US Army recently cancelled their free-to-play series of recruitment videogames. Here's why:An army briefing room. A four-star general enters with Herman, a pimply, greasy fifteen-year-old.  General: Men, meet Herman Wallace. He's topped...

The Effects of the Videogame Recession

Illustrations completed by the very talented, Bree Goodrow!

Lesser Known Videogame Characters

We are all familiar with Mario Sonic, Link, and other videogame adventurers but how often do you hear about their friends and family members that never quite prospered  into videogame legends. So I went digging through the old record books...

4 Things That Should Have Made Mario Controversial

There was a time when videogames were pretty controversial, with every news show saying that playing a game of Pokemon would turn you from an innocent, doe-eyed youth into a violent, doe-eyed killing machine. But somehow the Mario games never...

5 Great Books That Became Horrible Videogames

We have all seen a crappy movie based on a videogame.  We have all also played a crappy videogame based on a movie. We often see movies based on books (in fact, for a long time nearly all feature films were adapted from novels). ...

Marvel vs. Capcom 2 Strategy Guide, Written by My 15 Year-Old Self

A GoldenEye N64 Henchmen Reports Back to His Superiors

Commander: Lt., what the hell happened out there? I'm getting reports of massive causalities from all units. I thought we were up against just one man!Lt.: Yes, sir. It was a massacre. Commander: What's this I'm hearing about an explosion? I...

Critic Reviews a RollerCoaster Tycoon Park

Today I had the extreme misfortune of attending the 1-year anniversary of the amusement park, "Tootsie's Cabaret." Not only is it not amusing in the slightest, but I'm pretty sure it's a concentration camp and I'm shocked that I made it out alive....