I'm stuck with these three girls are nicknamed the "herpes whores" in a suite style dorm. They are trashy, nasty girls with respect for other people's stuff. I begun to lose my sanity when they were using a shit ton of my expensive salon brand conditioner. The stuff doesn't won't even work on their fake, bone dried hair because it's for non damaged, natural hair ONLY, yet they... Read More »
So first year of uni, I lived in a flat with 6 other people. We were an eclectic bunch, none of us were particularly close, but we all got on. But there was one girl who really pissed us all off. She was from Bulgaria, and at no point during the year made any effort whatsoever to embrace British culture. The only night she went out the entire year was for Bulgarian Independence Day, where she had 1 beer and came home before midnight. Initially she asked for quiet after hours, so we agreed to be quiet after midnight on weekdays. In the second term we were called to a flat meeting with the wardens as she'd complained to them we weren't adhering to her requests and being noisy at all times. Turns out she wanted absolute silence after 10pm EVERY night, and never any talking in the corridor outside her room at any time of day. She'd never said anything like this to us, so we were surprised. Also she had an annoying habit of Skyping her mum in Bulgaria for 3 hours a night every night and laughing so loudly everyone else in the flat had to put ear plugs in if they were trying to concentrate. The last annoying habit she had was taking things from our freezer if she couldn't get hers in and leaving it them on the side to defrost, including some ice-cream I'd bought mere hours before. So we began a guerilla attack. One of my housemates took it upon himself to be uproariously drunk and obnoxious every time he returned from a night out (about 3 or 4 nights a week) and imitating her accent when he shouted abuse outside her door. We also figured a way to set off the fire alarms with magnets whenever she had just gone to shower, and lastly my friend and I, being either side of her room, would alternate who was making an odd noise late at night so she would complain to either of us, where we were obviously completely nonplussed and innocent. I still see her around campus sometimes, and wonder if she's as obnoxious this year to her new flatmates, cause I know she didn't find somewhere to live until late summer.
Nej Steer |
My friend and I always like to mess with each other. One day I had met this girl and things were going pretty well, but because I knew he used to be into her, I asked to see if it was ok. He promptly gave me the thumbs up, but, as part of our ongoing prank war, texted her asking her out for me, when we barely knew eachother. It quickly weirded her out and ruined my chances, but... Read More » I had to get him back. He thought he had a chance (he didn't) with a super hot girl at our school. When I offered him her number he took it. Secretly I gave him my other friend's #, who was pretending to be the girl. They texted and even set up plans. He had the awkwardest conversation the next day when, in person, he really did talk to the girl and asked "Why weren't you there?" She was so confused and it was always awkward between them.
Well, I know now that you talk MAJOR shit about me with literally everyone I know... You know I have to say I'm not that surprised because it seems to be all that you do, but I thought we were close friends. I mean, I was the one to help you when you were embarrassingly throwing up all over yourself and others at a party while your longterm "marriage potential" boyfriend didn't... Read More » help AT ALL and only held the umbrellas while I had to carry your drunk puke smelling heavy ass 7 blocks by myself? HA WELL ANYWAYS, so I know you're really into conditioning your hair since its curly and what not so I took the liberty of peeing in your fancy conditioner this morning when I took a shower. Sorry.
Amber Crowe |
- Hey, Hoe. Remember how you dumped me, saying how I treated you wrong, despite doing whatever I humanly could to help you out? Well, I found out your dirty, little secrets. How you cheated on me multiple times and even said the reason we're dating is so when I graduate, I'll be making money. Well, while going through your room, grabbing whatever that's mine, I found your weed... Read More » stash. I took whatever you had, leaving just enough for you to smoke in your pipe. Why? Because I wiped my ass with it. Oh, and you work hat, too.
you ran over my dog left her their for 2 hours then called me a pussy when i cryed cus she had to be put down so it was me who shit on your bed stole 300 from you and i also called your mom and told about your weed and booze and got you cut off good luck dick
uPick is a new feature on CollegeHumor where YOU the user upload a story or picture to a category. You then vote up or down these stories as you see fit.