I purchased my wife a Garmin watch that had GPS and heart rate monitor etc. Most importantly for her it shows how many calories she's burned. So one week after doing a lot of running and biking she starts talking about how many more calories she burned when she does exercises that keep her heart rate up above 80% her max. To which I leaned in and whispered in her ear that maybe... Read More »
Whether you're dating, in love, or just Facebook stalking, relationships are weird.
"Kids, let me tell you how your mother and I decided ...
I am an Army Ranger, and as such I periodically spend large amounts of time in the field (the forest). Some years ago after a particularly long field exercise where I spent a month with no shower, laundry, etc. (only baby wipes to the armpits and groin every now and then), I was smelling pretty rancid. I come home to find my girlfriend in a nice sheer negligee to greet me. She runs up and kisses me and as she pulls away the expression on her face is one I can only describe as having just smelled a particularly rancid dirty diaper. Without saying a word she begins to give me a blowjob as I stand there in the living room with my dirty, smelly uniform on. I tell her she doesn't have to do this now, i'll take a shower real quick then we can have fun. But she doesn't stop until after about a minute or so (before I finish), when she gets up and runs to the bathroom (I figure to wash the taste of my sweaty cock and balls out of her mouth). I strip down and enter the bathroom prepared to take a much needed shower and am greeted by the sight of her puking in the toilet. Finishing puking, she washes her mouth out in the sink. With a look of determination on her face she immediately begins the blowjob again, gagging several more times due to the putrid taste and smell. I finish after several minutes, thanking her for her dedication. I had never seen anyone so determined to give me a blowjob before, all things considered; so I married her and we have two kids now.
Dave Not Given |
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