Back in 10th grade, my German teacher was explaining a project he wanted us to do and said it was worth a lot of points so if we didn't do it, we were screwed. Without even thinking, I blurted out, "But I like to be screwed." The whole class, including my teacher, laughed at me for 10 minutes.
Urine Fellowship
When I was in 9th grade my friend and I went after school to pick up my little bro from his school. We were waiting out the front of the school for him to finish when my friend gets this brilliant idea, to get his dick out right next to the front doors of the school and take a leak up against the outer wall of the principals office. He did this kind of stuff all the time, (I'm not saying I didn't do stupid things as well, It's just whenever it came time for someone to piss on something, it was always him.) so as usual I kept lookout. Mid stream, one of the teachers that used to teach me at that school walks out the front door and immediately starts freaking out at this guy splashing urine everywhere. My friend got so scared he started running away without putting his junk away, mid stream, letting loose all over himself. Of course, I got pulled into the principals office with all these teachers asking who my friend was and telling me how disgusting it is, while I tried to convince them I didn't know him. They called up my school and told them the whole story, so for the next day I got pulled into my principles office and he demanded a description of the elusive Piss Bandit. I covered for him for 3 days, putting my name on the line to cover his, and of course, after all the effort I went through to keep him out of trouble, he turns himself in and gets us both suspended for a week. I've since covered for his pisscapades on numerous other occasions and almost every time I've ended up getting burned. But hey, what are friends for, right?
I walked into my 8 o'clock class to be told by my teacher that we have a surprise quiz to take. She hands out the quizzes face down and told us not to flip them over until told so. She then tells us to start. Everyone flips their quizzes over to see a piece of paper that says, "April Fools!". The guy next to me then bolts up from his desk, looks directly at my teacher and tells... Read More »
So I'm a 4th year uni student who has decided to add and English minor to my degree to help my employment prospects as a teacher. I knew a first year classroom would be painful but I forgot just how painful. We were reviewing some crappy poem and discussing what we could pick up from a first reading. Normal English, touchy feely bullcrap and then one girl took the cake. She raised... Read More »
My photography teacher showed our class the "God Made a Farmer" video on YouTube because the photography in it was actually really good. At the conclusion of the video YouTube suggestions popped up as always and I noticed in the bottom right corner a suggestion......for Pornhub. I tried to take a picture but I spent so much time laughing and showing everyone else that I missed... Read More »
I have a professor who gets annoyed if students wear apparel from other schools. He told us he won't mind people doing that in March if their favorite team "makes it to the big dance." The guy next to me says with a totally straight face, "You mean there's a dance?"
So in class my teacher was telling us how researchers think they found an area like the Garden of Eden. Then a girl in my class says "Wait so they found her (as in Eve)". This is the same girl who thought that Adam and Eve were still alive.