FunBox Comedy's Articles

From the makers of HydroRush and Juicequake, comes the ultimate water experience. Introducing UltraWater, hydration has never been like this. You need water, but does water have everything you need? The answer isno to the max. UltraWater takes natural refreshment and adds enough science to kick mother nature into high gear. We start by mining the purest ice crystals from the Glystock Glacier and melting these over a live Volcano (volcano is one of the cleanest burning fuels). This results in a water that is so chemically pure and nutrient rich that the National Water Board has given it its highest rating, 3 stars. From here we add over 72 different vitamins and a 140 minerals that are essential to living in a modern urban world. This results in the heaviest water commercially available. Thirst quenching will be as much of an exercise as your work out. Put out your inner fires while burning serious calories. For the finishing touch that turns water into UltraWater we mix in the fresh essence of Mango, Tangelos, and Persimmons. Every bottle of UltraWater contains 72 percent real fruit juice flavors. The rest is up to you. Fist some UltraWater and slam it in you today!

With more and more video games based on Movies coming out everyday, FunBox is ready to predict the next big trend, video games based on classic literature.

Wuthering Heights: Heathcliff's Revenege - In this exciting retelling of the Bronte Classic, you take on the roll of a space marine recently returned home to Earth. Your parents died under mysterious circumstances and have left you Wuthering Heights. It seems though there is more to this Yorkshire manor on the moors than meets the eyes and your young curvaceous fiancé Cathrine is kidnapped. You will have to use all your space marine training to vanquish the evil ghost of Heathcliff and the unspeakable horrors of 1847 England!

Huckleberry Finn's Xtreme Rafting - Huckleberry Finn will do anything to get away from the severe beatings of his abusive father Pap, even challenge everyone to a wild Raft Race! Face off against Widow Douglas, Miss Watson, Tom Sawyer, Jim, Uncle Silas, Aunt Sally, Duke, King, and more as you paddle down the white knuckle rapids of the mighty Mississippi. If the twists and turns of the river weren't enough, you will have to keep a look out for pirates, robbers, and racism. Growing up has never been this fun or this wet!

To Kill a Mockingbird: Furor Excessum - The town of Maycomb, Alabama found itself the center of controversy in 1930's and now you can be a part of it with this ground breaking massively multiplayer online role playing game. Finally players will have a chance to experience social injustice any way they want. Help Atticus Finch win the trial of his life and help Boo Radley start his life anew all while avoiding rabid dogs and the Klan. The open world design of this sleepy small town provide hours of game play. Features include an in depth character class system with jobs like sheriff, clerk, teacher, and shut in, each with their own move set. An inventory system to rival the Sears catalog with its choices ranging from all cotton shirts to seersucker suits. Plus, a robust clan system so that teaming up with your friends is as easy as eating a slice of Calpurnia's world famous pie.

"Your kisses burn my flesh like the tears of angel."

"When I become you, I will not be able to do your beauty justice."

"One of the voices in my head has the same cute laugh as you."

"Shhh, dear. I don't think you need to lose weight. Plus this way I'll be able to make a vest."

"Wow, your perfume smells exactly like the inside of a guys face."

"Not even death can stop the way I feel about you."

"You are so still when you sleep. So still..."

"I can't stand the thought of something as perfect as you living in a world like this."

"You will be the one they remember me for."

"When we make love the screaming stops."

- Did you know chocolate was used as a monetary system by the ancient Incans, and for dessert, those poor backwards people ate money?

- Did you know the eating of chocolate releases endorphins into the brain that once gone, the eater will stop at nothing, not even murder, to feel the rush again?

- Did you know in Europe chocolate was only served to kings and the child whores the kings would sleep with?

- Did you know that enough chocolate is sold on Halloween that if it were lined up end to end it would take the man doing it as much time as it would to eat all the hamburgers sold in July?

- Did you know G.I.s in World War II were given Hershey Bars in their K-Rations to make up for them having to die?

- Did you know I cried when Johnny Depp's character Roux leaves at the end of Chocolat?

- Did you know the darker the chocolate the sweeter the taste?

- Did you know that a box of chocolates is considered a very romantic gesture if you are a husband from a 1950's sitcom who's in trouble with the misses?

- Did you know chocolate tastes better when you eat it out of that shoebox you keep hidden in your "closet of lies and shame"?

- Did you know Willy Wonka has the only chocolate churned by waterfall?