FunBox Comedy's Articles

Hello I am a cute college girl checking my MySpace! Please click on me because I am totally real. You can tell I am real because I am not so super hot as to clearly be an advertisement, yet still cute enough to grab your total attention.

Oh, ha ha ha! Something I read on screen made me laugh!

I'll grip this pillow tightly. Is it because I am cold? Or am I lonely? Either way if you were my real boyfriend you would keep me warm. It's a real possibility that you would become my boyfriend if you clicked on me.

Don't I seem fun? Remember when I laughed? I clearly must have a good sense of humor. Look! Below me there is what appears to be a chat screen.

I am typing messages to you!

Why are you not responding? If you don't click on me how will we ever meet and fall in love?

NO! Don't check your Inbox! If you don't click on me now then when you come back to your home screen I won't be here any more! I'll be replaced by ducks with targets on them or an opportunity to get in a boxing match with President Bush! All I ever did was yearn for you! How can you betray me like this?

Hello I am a cute college girl checking my Myspace! Please click on me because I am totally real... WIN AN X-BOX 360!

"Iron Man! They should call him Iron Suit Man, because it was his suit that was made of iron and not him and I don't even think he used iron."

"Did you see Stan Lee's cameo? He played the soulless man who would do anything for money."

"I love theater popcorn!"

"I should have waited to watch that on YouTube when it's a 3 minute montage of explosions set to Seal's ?Kiss from a Rose.'"

"Did you hear they are doing a comic based on the movie?"

"I couldn't decide who I wanted to kiss more, Iron Man or Tony Stark!"

"Badoo. Pwew! Pwew! Fwoomp! (Runs around like he is flying)."

"George Lucas really took Indiana Jones to a weird place."

"Wow, you can hardly tell that Robert Downey Jr. no longer has a drug problem."

"I was disappointed. That had nothing to do with the song "Iron Man."

"That movie just made me more excited for the upcoming Hulk movie!"

Student Caught Masturbating Behind Ion Cannon
Aresident of Yavin Hall called to report a man masturbating behind theV-150 Planet Defender Ion Cannon located outside his dorm window.  The Department of Public Safety reported. The cannon was undamaged but a cleaning crew was dispatched

Snowspeeder Damaged in Parking Lot
General Rieekan called to report that his snowspeeder was dented while parked behind Echo Base.  The speeder received minor fender damage estimated at 250 credits.  The incident is under investigation.

Tauntaun's Shaved in Fraternity Prank
Three tauntauns were shaved outside Dantooine House in what appears to be a fraternity prank.  DPS reported the tauntauns were cold and confused.

Hydrospanner Nabbed from Rack Near Docking Bay
A maintenance worker called to note that his FastTurn-3 hydrospanner stolen from its rack outside Docking Bay 7.  The hydrospanner was valued at 80 credits and was green.

Police Issue Wookie Alcohol Citation
Awookie was issued a minor in possession of alcohol citation, DPSreported. Police said the student was given the citation after beingfound pouring grape syrup into an ice corridor and claiming the hallwas his snow cone.

Graffiti Spray Painted on R-2 Unit
An R-2 unit notified public safety it discovered graffiti was spray-painted on torso after powering up from its sleep mode.  An arrow pointing the droid's speaker unit and the word "gay!" was written in black paint.  Police have no suspects.

The sweat burned my eyes. Blinking hard I tried to focus. I needed to focus. Only a cold blooded creature could consider a castle full of lava as its home. My overalls felt like they weighed a ton. My movements were all in slow motion. Even my moustache was drenched through. As the heat pressed in from all sides I wanted to give up. From the glint in his red eyes I could tell that's what he was waiting for. If it was just me maybe it would have been O.K. to just curl up and die, but she was counting on me, her and the entire Mushroom Kingdom. If he had laid one hand upon her soft flaxen hair so help me I would...

Damn. I had let my mind wander and he had seen it. A toothy grin spread across Bowser's face as he exhaled. The flaming expulsion from his bowels hurled towards me. He was gloating already that bastard. This was my chance. I summoned all the strength I had left and blindly leapt forward. With my eyes squeezed shut, I felt the intense heat of the fireball pass beneath my feet. I just might do it. I forced my eyes open. Seeing that look on Bowser's face invigorated me more than a thousand cold showers. He knew that death had finally come for him. I started to descend. My thick steel toed boots made contact with the vile lizard's skull. My full weight slammed his head into the stonework bridge. With a sickening crunch it was over. Bowser was dead. There was no time to celebrate or to consider how I was going to wash the reptile brains from my overalls, a crack had formed where we had landed and it was starting to splinter the walkway. I ran. The stones behind me fell away. I heard the sizzle from Bowser's corpse hitting the lava but I did not stop. I ran. I saw her face again. My princess. I jumped as the last piece of the bridge gave way.

- Did You Know the section of the digestive system typically associated with money, cars, and hoes, is the Livin' Large Intestine?

- Did You Know the human heart is almost identical to a pig's heart which explains why you're such a fat fuck?

- Did You Know that Humans evolved skin and tissue to hide their scary skeletons?

- Did You Know that the major medical textbook: Gray's Anatomy, is mostly about doctors having sex with each other?

- Did You Know Da Vinci first sketched his Vitruvian Man, perhaps the most famous depiction of the human body, while bored in his Spanish class?