CollegeHumor: Stuff Jeff Cohen Likes http://www.collegehumor.com http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1752460 A Sim Checking In... Fri, 04 Apr 2008 14:33:36 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1752460 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
When I didn't have free will

Hey Doug,

It's been a while, yeah? 7 years I think. 7 years since you last looked at my life. No hard feelings man, I learned English, that's a plus. No more with the pah flah bah attah mah shwah ah.

Oh! Other good news, I learned free will. That was a plus. For the first six months of your hiatus, I was just standing in my living room doing nothing. You wouldn't believe how many times I soiled myself.

Things with the wife are getting a little sh*tty, unfortunately. She's not putting out so I'm now forced to enter Move_Objects_On into the cheat box, move her out of the blurred area and just watch her naked. I'm starting to feel a little guilty. I think that's why you stopped, too.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:128053"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/e/collegehumor.e6ecc1ea45a24925c0772a0ee94f48a6.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-04-04 14:33:36 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:128053">Doug Kellner</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:553"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 205 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1797753 Urban Legend ER Thu, 17 Jan 2008 13:33:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1797753 Urban Legend ER nonadult comedy My cousin's friend's girlfriend told me about this video where every urban legend is true... CH Originals, hospital, best of ch originals, CH Sketches, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1797753"><img src="http://0.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/1/collegehumor.abd46c8bdde1128673f192616631b55a.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:21877">CH Staff</a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 2968 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1747862 Google Maps: Your First College Jog Wed, 09 Jan 2008 12:16:18 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1747862 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:34106"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/e/collegehumor.19dc6c6166e28b864a1f0ece84a80bf0.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-01-09 12:16:18 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:34106">Ben Joseph</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1236"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 672 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1747753 The Morning After: American Gladiators Mon, 07 Jan 2008 12:40:17 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1747753 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>


After twelve long years, American Gladiators returned to TV last night. It was far too epic to be covered by just one man, so this morning I sat down with Dan Gurewitch, Sarah Schneider and Patrick Cassels to discuss Hulk Hogan and his army of spandex-clad beasts.

Jeff: Well, was it worth the wait?

Justice, I'm pretty sure.
Dan: I think new gladiator Toa expressed the passion borne from years of absence the best when he said "Oota bata oota zuga numa bata yama zuga boota botta yama zata fukka."

Jeff: Fifteen minutes in I thought Hellga was a front runner for future Surreal Life participant, but after watching two hours I'm almost positive it's going to be Wolf.

Sarah: Was anyone else completely disappointed by Hellga's performance?

Dan: She could talk the talk, but she couldn't large foam square the large foam square.

Sarah: It just goes to show you: gladiators should never wear skirts.

Dan: I think Sarah wants to talk about Titan. I say this because her legs are quivering.

Sarah: My blonde Gaston? He's a real-life Disney prince. Everytime he looked at the camera and flexed, I melted a little inside.

Jeff: Titan is so smug. He's like a character Conan O'Brian slips into for 10 second spurts.

Patrick: Unlike the rest of the Gladiators, who are nothing but humility.

Sarah: He can't help it, it's his chiseled jaw's fault.

Sarah:
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