Tired of your old Photoshop filters? Adobe just released five new ones to make your life even better (or at least seem that way).

Roll over each image to see the new filters in action.

Zombie #1: BRAAAAIIINS...

Victim: AAIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE!!

Zombie #1: BRAAAAIIINS!

Zombie #2: Mark.

Zombie #1: Shhh, I'm trying to stay focused here. BRRAAAAIINNNS!!

Zombie #2: Mark that guy is getting away from us, like, really easily.

Zombie #1: Dude I know. Who would've thought a middle-aged used car salesman could suddenly turn into frickin' Usain Bolt? Usain Bolt when he was alive, I mean. Zombie Usain Bolt is slower than me somehow.

Zombie #2: But that guy's just... he's just walking briskly.

Zombie #1: I know! It's like, where's the fire, asshole? I mean, there's fires all over the place, but you know what I mean. *Sigh* C'est la vie. We'll get the next one.

Zombie #2: Mark, I've been thinking.

Zombie #1: How? Your head's barely on.

*Special thanks to Sara P. for submitting these*

Legend...wait for it...ofzelda!

Link: Huzzah! I've conquered innumerable foes, overcome impossible odds, trekked far and wide, come to the brink of death, defeated the unstoppable Ganon, and saved the fair princess!

Zelda: Yes, and for years to come, people will speak of the Legend of Zelda!

Link: Yes, the Legend of...what?

Zelda: Zelda - the legendary princess who was kidnapped and braved being trapped for a while until some elf guy saved her!

Link: I...I think you have this backwards. I'm the one who did all of the exciting stuff that would be considered legendary. It'll be the legend of Link that everyone talks about.

Zelda: Ugh, Link? That's not even a real name. Nope, that legend's all about Zelda.

Link: But...you didn't do anything.

Our newest Illustrator, Evan, was nice enough to follow in the steps of our previous illustrators and draw a comic Streeter and I have been dying to make. Sarah, happily makes a cameo.*

Pat also, was ecstatic to see his wildest dreams come to life by Evan's hand.

Koopa Troopa, Goomba, Shy Guy and Bob-omb sit in a pub. 

Troopa: How much longer they got you walking between those two pipes?

Goomba: Two more weeks on the job, then I'm retired. I can't wait to see my kids again.

King Koopa enters.

King Koopa: Hey guys!

Everyone: Hey, King Koopa! 

King Koopa: Ha, yeah, about that actually. You guys can just call me Bowser now.

Everyone looks confused.

Goomba: Bowser? What's Bowser?

King Koopa: It's my new nickname. You know, I'm a big turtle dinosaur, and everyone bows before me. I am the Bow-saur! Or Bowser, cause that's easier to say.

Goomba: That's retarded.

King Koopa crushes Goomba.

Troopa: Oh my god! Well, I definitely think it's cool!

King Koopa: Thanks! I knew I could count on you guys. So it's settled, I'm Bowser from now on.

Shy Guy: I don't know. What was wrong with just being King Koopa?

King Koopa: Uh, well... it's just that "King Koopa" was my father's name. And his father's, and his father's before that. That's kind of how monarchy works, you know? I figured it was time for a change.

Bob-omb: So this has nothing to do with the fact that someone spray-painted "King Poopa" all over your castle last week?

Ever brought a girl back to your place after a party? There's more to consider than just how long you last...

TV: Guys, he just put on The Notebook! He's hooking up!

Door: I'm not locked! I'm not locked! What do I do?!

Walls: Oh god, the pressure, why can't we be thicker?

Computer: Does this mean no porn tonight? Awh man...

Wallet: I THINK there's a condom in me. If not, bad luck Bed.

Bed: Ahh sh*t, I was only changed yesterday. Wait, they might do it on the carpet like last time.

Carpet: Not a chance, I gave him a burn he won't soon forget. You're screwed.

Bed: Desk?

Desk: Are you kidding? They only do it on me in the movies. I'm so lonely...

Bed: Thank god this chick is lighter than that last one. I was aching for
days.

Carpet: Awh yeah! His shirt just landed on me. It's going down!

CLASSIC MOOSE!

Jack: Alright you guys, listen up.

Gasinator: Pfffbbbbb! Ugh. Who beefed?

Jack: Not now, Gasinator, this is important. As you guys know, these are difficult times. Party attendance has declined steadily since the release of the Wii, and the current economic climate isn't helping. Our last Golf Pros and Tennis Hos party only brought in $23, and Moose accidentally bought a giant sandwich with it.

Squiggy: CLASSIC MOOSE!

Jack: The bottom line is that we no longer have the money to continue as a fraternity, which is why we're merging with Lambda Nu.

Burly: Lambda Nu? We hate those assholes.

Gasinator: Pfffbbbbb! Oh man. Someone just ripped ass.

Markowitz: Chill out, Burly. Those are our brothers you're talking about. We're all one big frat now. The biggest frat on campus, right? This could be great.

Jack: Not exactly. We're going to have to let a lot of you go.

The Omega Chi's shift uncomfortably.

Jack: Old Mike, you've been with Omega Chi for nine years, deftly avoiding graduation time and time again.

Old Mike smiles proudly.

Jack: But the Lambda Nu's have a guy that's been here for 13 years. I'm sorry. You're being replaced by Old Steve.

Roll over the images to see what cereal boxes should really be saying...

As a continuation of Photoshop Ph-Thursday, roll over for the Photoshopped versions of these pictures.

Earlier this week, a Polish Microsoft ad surfaced in which they had photoshopped out the black guy, presumably because Microsoft believes there are no black people in Poland. This isn't the only time Microsoft has used Photoshop to pander to foreign cultures:

India

Australia

Don: When a man visits a website, he's looking for something more than code and images. He's looking for...himself. He's looking for something that makes him special. But a man is nothing if he feels lost in the vastness and anonymity of the internet.

Campbell: Where are you going with this, Draper?

Don: What if the ad existed on it's own separate window? A window that would just "pop-up," as if out of thin air? Like a lightbulb flashing above your head - here it is. It's the answer to the question you didn't even know you were asking.

Campbell: But why wouldn't he just minimize or close the window? What's so special about it?

Don: It's not the window that's special, Campbell. It's the man who clicks it. In fact, the window isn't a window at all. It's a mirror. It's a reflection of the man's specialness...his soul. It tells him that he's the one millionth visitor, and he's won a free iPod Shuffle.

Campbell: That's preposterous!

Don: Even if he isn't actually the one millionth visitor, he's still one in a million. He's unique, he's special. That's why the ad popped up. Because of him. The pop-up ad is just for him, no one else. That's why he clicked it.

Campbell: But we can't just give away millions of iPod Shuffles!

Showgirls:

Int: Showgirls Strip Club. A sexy cowgirl finishes her lasso routine.

DJ: All right, fellas, give one last yippee-kai-yay to Veronica!

Customers: Wooo!

DJ: Next up we have.... we have... oh no, oh jesus god no, not again... ahem, I said, next up we have the slim and sexy Cassandra!

Cassandra enters.

Customers: (screams, gagging noises)

DJ:Cassandra is 20 years old and her hobbies include being the only one-legged, no-armed stripper at Showgirls. She's all woman, folks. Well... actually, she's like... thirty-five percent of a woman, but what parts of her the sharks didn't take off are still... are still... please, I don't want to read this...

Customer 1: I think I'm going to throw up.

Customer 2: You just threw up!

Customer 1: I think I'm going to throw up forever.

---

Buzz Aldrin: This is so messed up. I deserve this just as much as you do.

Neil Armstrong: Look, Buzz. We've been over this. I called it fair and square during training.

Buzz: There is no way that counts. You called it when we were inside a classroom. You couldn't even see the space shuttle OR the moon. It's against the rules.

Neil: Fine...I call I get to walk on the moon first! Ha! We are both inside the shuttle, and I can see the moon through the window. You just got ARMSTRONGED!

Buzz: Come on, this moment is way too important to just call it like that. Generations to come will remember the name of the first person to walk on the moon.

Neil: Then we should go by who has the coolest name. My last name is Armstrong. Game over.

Buzz: Now, hold on. My first name is Buzz. That's pretty cool.

Neil: No, your first name is Edwin, which is super lame. Your nickname is Buzz. Anyone can come up with a cool nickname. Hell, I could start calling myself Hacksaw Armstrong and blow your nickname out of the water.

Buzz: That's ridiculous; nobody would ever call you that. The only other name people might call you is "Louis Armstrong" because they'll get confused.

On a warm spring morning in Montgomery, Alabama, Robert Parks, great grandson of Civil Rights activist Rosa Parks, steps onto a school bus and sits in the first seat next to Gil Chesterton, who kinda looks like Paul Giamatti and more-than-kinda smells like a fryerlator...

Bus Driver: Robert, what do you think you're doing?

Robert: What do you mean?

Bus Driver: Why are you sitting in the front of the bus?

Robert: I dunno, 'cause I want to.

Bus Driver: Allow me to remind you Robert, in case you haven't looked in the mirror in a while, that you're a good-looking kid and a star athlete that everyone likes.

Robert: So?

Bus Driver: So you have to sit in the back of the bus with the other popular kids.

Robert: But why?

Bus Driver: Because this is America...That's how it's always been, and that's how it's always gonna be.