CollegeHumor: User 1657072's Articles

CollegeHumor: User 1657072's Articles http://www.collegehumor.com http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1794521 5 Famous Last Status Updates Tue, 17 Nov 2009 18:00:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1794521 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-11-17 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1182 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1794126 Pickup Lines Of 10 Historical Figures: Part 2 Wed, 11 Nov 2009 17:01:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1794126 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-11-11 17:01:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 387 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1794043 5 Inappropriate Situations To Twitter Thu, 05 Nov 2009 18:00:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1794043 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Disclaimer: Tweets are chronologically backwards for the sake of readability

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-11-05 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 591 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1793846 Social Hierarchy Org Charts Through The Years Tue, 03 Nov 2009 18:00:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1793846 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-11-03 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1564 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1793408 Videogame University Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:41:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1793408 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-10-23 17:41:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1024 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1793014 College Obituaries Thu, 22 Oct 2009 17:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1793014 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-10-22 17:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 278 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1792716 If Drinking Was A Sport Mon, 12 Oct 2009 18:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1792716 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-10-12 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 425 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1792544 Pickup Lines Of 10 Historical Figures Tue, 20 Oct 2009 17:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1792544 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-10-20 17:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1380 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1792434 Honest College Catalog Mon, 19 Oct 2009 17:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1792434 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-10-19 17:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 252 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1791223 The Super Sh*tty Friends Fri, 18 Sep 2009 16:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1791223 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-09-18 16:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 641 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1790800 5 Tips For A Successful Fantasy Football Season Wed, 02 Sep 2009 12:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1790800 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Fantasy football season is upon us, and before you go listening to the so-called "experts" who get so-called "paid to do what they do", make sure you read these five helpful tips for a great fantasy season.

1. Draft people who are currently playing in the NFL.

True story: Last year I had a 12-1 record and a first round bye heading into the playoffs. So you can imagine my dismay when in Week 15 I decided to bench a struggling Greg Jennings and my only replacement options were former New York Giant great Frank Gifford and my 4th grade Science teacher.

At best, she's a late round sleeper.

2. If you're going to draft a player from another sport, make sure the player you're drafting isn't a fictional movie character.

It's entirely possible that drafting Usain Bolt in the later rounds could pay huge dividends, especially in Keeper Leagues. However this theory doesn't ring true with, say, Cubs pitcher Henry Rowengartner, my 2nd round pick in 2007. Funky butt lovin' indeed.

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-09-02 12:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 25 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1790389 7 Websites In the Future Mon, 24 Aug 2009 18:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1790389 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-08-24 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 512 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789558 The Rime Of The Ancient Frat Boy Mon, 17 Aug 2009 15:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789558 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-08-17 15:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 18 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789491 Notes From Past Bayside High School P.T.A Meetings Wed, 19 Aug 2009 13:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789491 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-08-19 13:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 44 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789152 The New U.S Citizenship Exam Wed, 05 Aug 2009 15:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789152 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-08-05 15:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 40 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788966 Sh*t Show vs. Not A Sh*t Show Mon, 03 Aug 2009 17:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788966 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-08-03 17:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 32 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788587 These 10 Albums Should Have Been Called... Tue, 28 Jul 2009 15:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788587 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-07-28 15:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 54 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788120 Robert Parks Crosses The American School Bus Cooler-Barrier Wed, 22 Jul 2009 15:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788120 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

On a warm spring morning in Montgomery, Alabama, Robert Parks, great grandson of Civil Rights activist Rosa Parks, steps onto a school bus and sits in the first seat next to Gil Chesterton, who kinda looks like Paul Giamatti and more-than-kinda smells like a fryerlator...

Bus Driver: Robert, what do you think you're doing?

Robert: What do you mean?

Bus Driver: Why are you sitting in the front of the bus?

Robert: I dunno, 'cause I want to.

Bus Driver: Allow me to remind you Robert, in case you haven't looked in the mirror in a while, that you're a good-looking kid and a star athlete that everyone likes.

Robert: So?

Bus Driver: So you have to sit in the back of the bus with the other popular kids.

Robert: But why?

Bus Driver: Because this is America...That's how it's always been, and that's how it's always gonna be.

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-07-22 15:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 46 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1787878 If These Famous Comedians Were Famous Musicians, They'd Be... Tue, 14 Jul 2009 17:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1787878 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

Chris Farley and David Spade are...

Biggie Smalls and Diddy.

Each pair had a larger than life character who was, by any indication, the more talented and beloved figure of the two. Aside from physical similarities, each pair had a stranglehold on their respective industries for a small yet unforgettable window in the early to mid-90s.
Spade and Farley were part of "The Bad Boys Of SNL" and helped make the show hip again, and starred in one of the great comedies of the 90s, Tommy Boy. Meanwhile, under the "Bad Boy" record label, Diddy and Biggie collaborated on Ready to Die to put East Coast rap back on the map after years of West Coast domination.

Unfortunately, the lives of both Farley and Smalls were tragically cut short in 1997 from entirely preventable incidents. Both Spade and Diddy have soldiered on, but today represent mere caricatures of their former selves, and the question of "what if?" still lingers.

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-07-14 17:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 49 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1787676 Dispatches From Freshman Orientation At The University Of Al-Qaeda Mon, 13 Jul 2009 13:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1787676 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> 9:00 AM EST:
Welcoming Address (Guest Speaker Ayman Al-Zawahiri)
--One awkward moment: The ringing of the speaker's phone prompted him to apologize for "blowing up" in the middle of his speech. This unfortunate choice of phrase caused everyone in attendance to take cover under their chairs. We all had a laugh over our faux pas, and were promptly reprimanded for laughing.

10:15 AM EST:
Ice Breakers
--Because socializing is forbidden,"ice breakers" consist of a group of people sitting Indian style in a circle smashing a large block of ice with hammers. It is by far the most enjoyable ice breaker I've ever participated in.

11:30 AM EST:
Lunch
--I sit down at the "outcast" table on the outer edges of the cafeteria with the other white people. To my right is Paul Kearney,Undeclared, who ordered the Death To American Chop Suey with a side of Dills of Afghanistan. On my left is Christine Johnson, Communications, with a tray including Fatwanton soup and U.S.S. Coleslaw. On my plate is The Great Satan (a.k.a Western) Omelette and Freedom Fries. Otherwise enjoyable lunch interrupted by three orientation counselors starting food fight with us then proceeding to hide under the table occupied by several Pakistanis.

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-07-13 13:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 25 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />