Ethan: Intros are for jerks, so let's get down to business:  who's #1 in NCAA hoops?

Amir:  Nobody really knows, and the best part about it: it really doesn't matter. This isn't college football. There can, and will be, four number ones. Then a month later, we'll know the exact answer: George Mason. They really thought of everything!

Ethan: You call that an answer?  Tim Hardaway's given more coherent and complete responses to questions in the last week.

Amir: Well, I can tell you who it's not: Wisconsin.

Ethan: Sorry, I don't read the AP Poll.

Amir: I love how ESPN is playing up the fact that they had them at #2 in their poll. "NUMBER TWO falters!" "The SECOND BEST team in the nation lost today." It's the largest sports network in the world and they make no reference to the fact that the Badgers were #1 in the AP poll. To them, there is only one newspaper in the world: USA Today.

Ethan: It's what America reads, after all.  I'm not all that sold on Wisconsin, either.  I like Tucker, but the few times I've seen them play, they don't have that scary dominant feel that most champs do.

Amir: They're kinda like their football team. Just good enough to stick around.
 
Ethan: It feels too much like the Alando Show to go all that far.  I think it's hard to pick against Florida.  They've got experience, don't have a glaring weakness, are well-coached, and opposing players turn to stone just from looking at Joakim Noah.  So, who do you actually like?

Amir: I would say Florida too. Experience is such a funny term though in college basketball. In a sport where the greatest players stick around for only one whole season, when you can get a starting five that actually has a few juniors/seniors on it, you're an experienced team. "Wow! He's been here for four years!? What was 2003 like, Grandpa!?"

Ethan: "Do you remember Chris Paul!?"

Amir: "Was UConn ever good at basketball!?"

Ethan: Welcome to an all-debate Straight Cash, Homey argument this week.  Commenters, tell us we're idiots and what we should be choosing.  Let's kick things off with the big question in college basketball this year:  which freshman do you like more, Greg Oden or Kevin Durant? 

Amir:  Durant. Next.

Ethan: Are you kidding?

Amir: No.

Ethan: Durant's a great player, but how often do dominant big men come along?  Especially ones who can shoot ridiculously high percentages with their off hand?  Oden's the best center in college basketball with his bad hand, and I think he'd still be in the top six or seven centers in the NBA if he started playing tomorrow.  Plus, his Social Security checks mean you don't have to pay him nearly as much, and Medicare takes care of his health insurance. Also,  I give extra points for looking like you could be Dikembe Mutombo's dad.

Amir: Well, you asked me who I liked better, and I like talent. Durant is more talented than Oden, off -hand or not. He's shorter than Oden and putting up numbers like 37 points and 23 rebounds in a single game!? Everybody is saying stuff like "Durant is more talented, but you have to take Oden first." That doesn't make sense to me. Then again twenty three years ago they were saying, "Why take Michael Jordan!? He's talented, but he's not tall like that Sam Bowie kid."

Ethan: Super Bowl XLI has come and gone, and although the Colts won, it seems to have left people with more questions than answers.  Will Indy repeat?  Will Rex keep his job?  And, most importantly, STILL FEEL LIKE DANCIN', NORBIT?!

Amir: Go Bears indeed. Go and find a new quarterback. Honestly, I'm getting a little angry at people who are blaming Rex. Yes, he had a mediocre game. Yes he decided to play "Three Flies Up" in the fourth quarter. But what about the Bears "amazing defense?" The Colts gained 430 yards on offense! Not even Brian Griese could compete with that. Would you give Rex another season? Or is this it for Gross Man.

Ethan: The Bears' D was already thinned by injuries, and then the offense couldn't keep them off the field.  I think you gotta drop Grossman.  He misplayed snaps all season long, and that wasn't just because of the rain.  He's a walking turnover, and not like the delicious apple kind you buy at Arby's.  Well, those aren't delicious, but the anti-simile works.  I think if they go out and find a relatively competent QB, they can send Rex to the Island of Misfit Toys.  Jeff Garcia's available, and he'll never miss practice because he's getting a haircut.  Is the monkey now off of Peyton's back?  How did he win the MVP over Dom Rhodes?  Were Archie and Eli the only two voters?

Amir:  They weren't going to give Rhodes the MVP and not Addai. It wouldn't be fair, so they chose Peyton. I think it's fine. Peyton was much more valuable than Rhodes was. To argue otherwise would just be idiotic. You're not an idiot are you? I agree with your Rex sentiment. You know what I'd love to see, is my boy Drew Bledsoe at the helm. I'd also love to see Edgerrin James watching the SuperBowl. What could possibly be going through his mind?

Ethan: The Cardinals are only a player or two away, and he knows it.

Amir: "Whatever man. We practically beat the bears, too!"