See if you can match the face to the embarrassing event! Answers after the jump.

  KEEP READING

It's my favorite time of the week, it's time for the Weekly WYR. See if you're brave enough to choose a side in what surely are the universe's most difficult quagmires. And remember, if you've got a great WYR, send it to me at Streeter.Seidell @ Gmail.com.

Would You Rather...

• Fight one hundred kindergarteners or one extremely jacked guy? From Tom
• Slice like a ninja or cut like a razor blade? From Vanilla
• See your parents having kinky sex or see your grandparents having normal sex? From Linh
• Always have your fingers be sticky or greasy? From Falcon
  
• Get a tattoo of a wiener on your nose or a tattoo of a nose on your wiener? From Lindsay
• Live in a world where people only speak 300 quotes or Borat quotes? From Halu
• Watch your hot cousin eat a popsicle or watch your ugly cousin undress? From Rolph
• Have to take freezing cold or scalding hot showers for the rest of your life? From Chris
• Live free to die hard? From John

Finally, this week's winner of the Melt My Mind Award is Amnon, who sent in this.

• Can I please be the winner of the "Can I please be the winner of the Award?" award?

Way to go, Amnon, you bugged me out.

Send your best WYRs to Streeter.Seidell @ Gmail.com 

In an effort to show our younger readers a little bit of what college is all about, we hereby declare this Orientation Week on CollegeHumor. All week we'll be posting articles - new ones, old ones and ones from our Guide to College - all about that magical time known as Freshman year. Also, be sure to check out the results of our Freshman Year Survey RIGHT HERE.

Now, everybody sit in a circle and say one thing you really enjoy doing...BUT it has to start with the same letter as your first name! 

This is what happens when corporations change pwn3rship.
 

It's my favorite time of the week, it's time for the Weekly WYR. See if you're brave enough to choose a side in what surely are the universe's most difficult quagmires. And remember, if you've got a great WYR, send it to me at Streeter.Seidell @ Gmail.com.

Would You Rather...

• Poop pretty good blueberries or plums that were the best thing you've ever eaten? From Jake
• Live long or prosper? From Andrew
• Be 4' 9" or 8' 10"?
  
• Listen to an endless loop of Creed or Nickelback? From Jason
• Be able to hook up with everyone from the hottest 1% of the opposite gender, or anyone from the other 99%? From Patrick
• Look like Tay Zonday or sound like Tay Zonday? From Joe
• Have to chew food 100 times before you could swallow it or every time you were thirsty you could only suck on an ice cube until it melted? From Popcorn
• Be covered in bruises or covered in scratches?
  
• Have friends who spend all your money, or no friends at all? From Kyle
• Eat a Jelly-fish or drink one? From Luke
• Feel a little bit worse every single day or your life or feel the worst you can feel today and have it get a little bit better everyday?
  
• Live your life to the soundtrack of 300 or Saturday Night Fever? From Matt

Finally, this week's winner of the Eloquent Complainer Award is Martin, who sent in this.

• hey fagget, ur gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
  

Thanks, Martin! Nice job using all those big boy words!

Send your best WYRs to Streeter.Seidell @ Gmail.com 

This month I had the pleasure of asking Miss September, Patrice Hollis, some very important questions. Patrice is 25, lives in Vegas and has 34DDD boobs. Interesting...

1. What is funnier and why: a kid walking into a glass door and falling down or a grown man falling down and instantly getting back up going “I’m fine…I’m fine.”
I think a man falling is funnier because he's more embarrassed.

2. What is sexier in a guy: ability to ski very well or ability to snowboard very well?
Either one as long as he doesn't fall.

3. What is the most food you’ve ever eaten at once?
A large pizza but then I had to sleep at the table because I couldn't move!

4. Gross. Did you get to choose how much of your body to show in the pictures or is that something Playboy decides?
Playboy decides, but they make sure you are comfortable.  KEEP READING

  KEEP READING

 

Hey...hey guys, check out this hat! Haha. What's cookin' good lookin'? Brotha, can ya spare a dime? So funny. Oh man, can you believe, like, our grandfathers wore this kind of retarded hat around for real? Man, how they managed to find girls willing to bone them is beyond me! Why I oughta! Haha. Oh man, I can't believe this was just laying around! This hat is so mine.

---

Two days later
Oh dude, remember that hat I found the other day? I was wearing it this morning and...yeah, I just, like, laid it on my bedside table last night and then put it on when I woke up or whatever...and it makes my hair do this awesome flippy thing. No, I'm not gay, dickhead, I'm just saying. See how my hair is kind of flipping out today? It's from wearing that hat. Chrissy said it looked good, too. I mean, yeah, that hat is gay as sh*t, but you can't deny my hair looks straight slamming today.  KEEP READING

On July 20th, 1969, Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin became the first humans to walk to on the moon. A third crew member, Michael Collins, piloted the command module which remained in orbit around the moon. This is a transcript of communications sent by Collins to Armstrong and Aldrin.

 

Gateway Favor - The seemingly inconsequential first favor you do for a new friend which opens the door for that friend to ask more, bigger favors of you in the future

Ex: "Kevin asked me to help him move yesterday. I didn't realize that picking up his laundry for him 2 months ago was such a gateway favor."

---

Do you want to help expand the English language? Email me your submission and definition at streeter.seidell @ Gmail.com with the subject "Words"