So You've Graduated College!
by Andrew B. July 08, 2008One day, as horrifying as it may seem, you will have to leave college. No more waking up at 3:29 in the afternoon and then rushing out to show up late and still drunk to your 3:30 class. It's time to make something of yourself. What will YOU become when you leave that beer-soaked wonderland and enter that beer-soaked real world?
The Sixth Year Senior: Film vs. Reality
by aaron hertzog July 02, 2008
Dude, you see that guy? Yeah, the one with the whole DZ house surrounding him. He is the man! He throws the sickest parties, everybody comes to them. I think he seriously knows every person here, I don't know how he does it. Every single hot chick on campus comes I'm not even lying. No, he's not a douchebag at all, he's cool with anybody. I saw him take this total acapella group dork and hook him up with a smoking hot babe. Yeah, he's been here a while but he's just making the most of his time in school. You know what he told me once? He looked me in the eye and said "Graduating from college is like retiring from fun." He's like f-ing Confucius. The professors all love him, they all practically beg him to take their classes. He's got this sweet job waiting for him when he decides to get out of here. Yeah he just said he "doesn't need the pressure of making like 750 thousand a year right now." How cool is that.
Do your parents not understand technology? Do they ask you stupid questions? Do they send you absurd text messages? Do they use words like "MyFace," "SpaceBook," or "The World Wide Web?"
If you've got an example of your Parents Just Don't Understanding, submit it here.
And thank God we'll never be as dumb as they are!
Brent F, University of South Carolina
My mom got on my laptop and opened the 'my documents' folder and proceeded to ask me, " But where are MY documents?"
Robert W.
The voice that says the directions and when to turn on my parents' GPS is a female (with an Australian accent, WTF dad?) voice. So every time my dad and mom discuss what the GPS is saying, they say things like, "Oh, she said to turn here." or, "Looks like she's getting low on batteries."
Eric W, Miami
Lou Bega Doesn't Mind If You Illegally Download His Music
by Patrick Cassels July 03, 2008
It's been an entire week since your last confession and there's been a lot of good, solid sinning going on across the country. Check out the top 5 and don't forget to submit your misdeeds to our new submission page!
Joshua Deckard, James Madison University
You left your sh*t all over the room, never washed your clothes or sheets, and made our room reek of pot all year long. I never stopped you from hooking up with the fat ugly chicks you found in the bathrooms at the end of parties every weekend. I win.
PH, School Not Given
About Me
Streeter enjoys many things, not least of which is being your front page editor here at CollegeHumor. In fact, he likes it so much he decided to get paid for it and make it his career. He spends his days making sure you have enough updates and hotlinks to keep you from your work for at least two hours. Streeter also likes to write; not well, mind you, but frequently. Please, enjoy his archive.
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