CollegeHumor: User 300's Articles

CollegeHumor: User 300's Articles http://www.collegehumor.com http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1755709 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 22 May 2008 23:00:08 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1755709 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Oh hai dear readers. I want to be nice and give you all the hot, juicy gossip. But first, I must show you these pics of Sharon Stone's vagina, cuz grandma's got some serious ish going on down there. [WWTDD]

I'll wait why you puke. Okay! Now back to the hotness.

Like....Jessica Simpson giving herself a breast exam in a bikini while on vacation in Mexico. If only Tony Romo hadn't dumped her, he could be rubbing that fine mess of a boob right now. [Egotastic]

You'd think it'd be really sexy to look at pics of the chick who won The Bachelor walking on the beach in a bikini. However that stingray she's holding really knocks my girl boner down a few notches. [HollywoodTuna]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-05-22 23:00:08 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 35 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1755339 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 15 May 2008 21:13:42 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1755339 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Is there a presidential election going on? Because all I see see is skin.

Kim Kardashian loves looking at herself in a bikini, and so do I. [Egotastic]

On the other hand, Lily Allen gets naked to go swimming, and she looks exactly like what you imagine your sister to look like naked. Judge for yourself here: [Egotastic]

Jessica Simpson's boy toy Tony Romo cheated on her with another plastic looking blonde with fake skin. See a pattern? [DListed]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-05-15 21:13:42 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 8 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1754869 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 08 May 2008 21:23:43 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1754869 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Elisabeth Hasselbeck, the annoying conservative chick from The View shows off her bikini=ready body after popping out two kids. Too bad she's a mom only John McCain would LTF. [CelebSlam]

This is my favorite picture of the week - it involves British lingerie models and Sex and the City. CLICK! [CelebSlam]

Former supermodel Stephanie Seymour is not important, but her weird nipple-showing dress sure is! [IDLYITW]

Amy Winehouse was arrested again this week for more crack crap, not for this ridiculous outfit. [WWTDD]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-05-08 21:23:43 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 8 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1753809 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Fri, 25 Apr 2008 14:03:25 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1753809 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Happy Spring, friends! Let's look at some skin, shall we?

Megan Fox was voted the Sexiest Woman in the World by FHM magazine,
which obviously doesn't mind that she bones a washed-up star from Beverly Hills, 90210. That kinda pushes her back to like, number 3 in our book. [IDLYITW]

Here is Britain's hottest woman, Amy Winehouse, after she beat up a of couple dudes at a bar. Amy might get arrested! Hey if she won't go to rehab, jail works. [CelebSlam]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-04-25 14:03:25 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 22 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1753342 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 17 Apr 2008 21:17:16 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1753342 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Gossip time. 3, 2, 1...

Blast off. Hayden Panettiere is hotter than you, and that is okay. Someone has to carry the weight for all us uglies, right? [CelebSlam]

BritBrit might be the new spokesperson for Bally Gym, because she's worked out there a couple of times and is low on tattoo cash. Getting a pair of lips on your wrist is expensive ya'll! [CelebSlam]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-04-17 21:17:16 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 16 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1752407 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 03 Apr 2008 20:34:34 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1752407 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Hello lovers. I bet you were sitting around wishing someone would show you some naked pictures of Angelina Jolie from when she was 16, right?

Well here they are, my friends! Personally I find these to be pretty tame for a lady who likes to wear viles of blood around her neck. But still, how many of you can claim that your mom posed naked as a teen and then just got hotter with age? I thought not. [Egotastic]

Britney is allegedly on her way toward a comeback because she stopped drinking 10 gallons of sugar a day and is now like, totally into wearing a bra. I change my sheets once every four months, does that make me special? [WWTDD]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-04-03 20:34:34 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 15 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1751947 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 27 Mar 2008 21:16:06 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1751947 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> It's March Madness ya'll, and you know what that means - a bunch of crazy bitches running around Hollywood!

1. Wanna come really close to seeing Jessica Simon's V Zone? Now your wish can come true. She may not have a career, but she's still a tease! [IDLYITW]

2. Richie Sambora - who does something in Bon Jovi and was married to Heather Locklear but then ruined it by effing Denise Richards - was arrested for drunk driving. Pretty standard for LA, except his 10-year old daughter was in the car. At least we can predict that she'll be hot and crazy by the time she's 18. Nice work dad. [WWTDD]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-03-27 21:16:06 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 10 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1751539 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Wed, 19 Mar 2008 22:38:28 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1751539 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> I am off early this week to head to Beantown to celebrate Jesus' resurrection, so I'm givin' you the abridged gossip scoop this week. But I promise, it'll be short and super skanky! Just like that outfit you're wearing to Easter dinner.

1. Audrina Patridge of The Hills (the brown-haired one) is even boring while nude. But at least she's nude! [WWTDD]

2. Our favorite hooker, Ashley Alexandra Dupre, was about to be offered $1 million from Girls Gone Wild to do dirty things, but it turns out she already did 'em for the video company on her 18th birthday. [IDLYITW]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-03-19 22:38:28 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 20 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1751250 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 13 Mar 2008 22:42:15 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1751250 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Brit's locked up at home, Paris is in love, and Lindsay's too busy admiring her V to do anything scandalous. I need some skanks to do something! Until then I'll just spoon with Lindsay blow up doll. So here's what I got for you - have fun tearing it apart. [HollywoodTuna]

1. Mandy Moore's mom is a lesbian and got caught up in some girl-on-girl love triangle. If only it was her daughter doin' it with the ladies. Am I right, fellow females? I'd pinch hit for a chance to bat against Mandy, know what I'm sayin'? [IDLYITW]

2. Eliot Spitzer, my fine, former Governor here in NY, got caught up in a scandal this week after it came out that he boned prostitutes. Spitzer resigned, so now we can just focus on how hot the chick he boned - on the night before Valentine's Day! - is. Like, seriously HOT. If only you had $4000. [IDLYITW]

3. Here are some racy pics of Sienna Miller. I don't know if they qualify as sexy because her ancient man-beast boyfriend is in them. So jerk-off at your own risk. [WWTDD/Egotastic]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-03-13 22:42:15 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 11 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1750895 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Fri, 07 Mar 2008 12:58:38 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1750895 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> As Jon Stewart would say: "Here it is, your moment of zen." Except this time, the zen involves boobs, butts, and crazy people. Fun!

1. Kim Kardashian on vacation: now with 90% more skin than the regular version! [WWTDD]

2. This year American Idol has a stripper in its midst! And no, it's not Ryan Seacrest. Sorry grandmas! [IDLYITW]

3. Angelina looks hotter pregnant. Boobs do a body good. [WWTDD]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-03-07 12:58:38 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 17 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1750537 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Fri, 29 Feb 2008 16:40:08 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1750537 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Hello friends. Let's leap into this gossip, shall we? (I know, I know. Horrible joke.)

1. Hugh Hefner wants Lindsay Lohan to pose in Playboy. As if there weren't enough burnt out old ladies in that mag already. [Egotastic]

2. Lindsay's little sister Ali Lohan, 14, is desperate to be just like her big sis! Yes, a life of random sex, coke nose, and self-tanner is something toward which all young girls should aspire. Dream big! [WWTDD]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-02-29 16:40:08 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 21 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1750150 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 21 Feb 2008 22:09:41 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1750150 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Hello old friends. Did you catch the lunar eclipse the other night up in the sky? The moon looked huge! In case you missed it, allow Kim Kardashian's butt to demonstrate what it kind of looked like. [IDLYITW]

Christina Aguilera appeared on the Ellen DeGeneres Show, and Ellen went right for the jugular - or rather, her jugs. [Egotastic]

This week Lindsay Lohan showed off her bad Marilyn Monroe impression, her great boobies and her freckle collection (we're talking NAKED PICS!!!). What is she famous for again? [DListed]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-02-21 22:09:41 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 15 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1749816 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Fri, 15 Feb 2008 13:17:57 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1749816 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> And, we're off!

Jamie-Lynn Spears has been busy boning other dudes while she's been knocked up, and is even allegedly using her pregnancy as a birth control. Think she learned that trick from her big sister? [WWTDD]

Britney is apparently attempting to get Governor Schwarzenegger to help her gain legal control of her estate (her dad is currently the boss). Maybe they should just compare crappy career moves instead. So what if she doesn't have her kids - she didn't make Kindergarten Cop! [IDLYITW]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-02-15 13:17:57 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 18 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1749409 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 07 Feb 2008 22:05:24 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1749409 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

New mom Christina Aguilera was spotted out on the town this week for the first time since her son was born. The reason? Her boobs needed to vote - one picked Clinton and one Obama. Can you guess which? [HollywoodTuna]

Amy Winehouse was denied a visa to come to the US for the Grammys - because America's got enough crackheads to worry about without shipping in a couple of British imports. You know who I'm talkin' about... [CelebSlam]

BRITNEY(!!!) bailed on the treatment she was receiving in the UCLA pysch ward to follow her passion - wailing in a British accent while driving around at 100 MPH in her $55,000 Mercedes. Oh, and also - flashing her equally as insane poontang. [WWTDD]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-02-07 22:05:24 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 15 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1749026 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 31 Jan 2008 21:09:50 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1749026 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Friends. It is possible that we've entered into a Britney Spears-free zone for the next 3-14 days! Get out the party hats and the vodka shots (but don't let Britney have any)!

Oops, She Did it Again: Yup, Britney's been committed to her second hospital psych ward, after family, friends, her lawyers, a shrink and the LAPD staged an intervention bigger than the Superbowl. She is now resting comfortable and receiving treatment - in the form of medicine and not tacos, booze and cigarettes - for her bipolar disorder. The girl hadn't slept in five days, was taking ten laxatives a day, and was driving around like a lunatic. Let's hope she gets a break - and gives us one too. [DListed]

But first, here are some pics of Britney wearing a white, see-through half-shirt a few days before her recent nervous breakdown. Staring at her nipples makes my stomach feel chaotic. Blergh. [WWTDD]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-01-31 21:09:50 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 20 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1748706 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 24 Jan 2008 21:27:33 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1748706 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> So let's get this out of the way: this week Heath Ledger, a seriously talented and hot dude, died at the age of 28. The cause of death is currently unknown and won't be clear until autopsy reports come in 2 weeks. There were NO illegal drugs found in his apartment, no coke on that rolled $20 bill, and no pills strewn around his body. The man has a 2-year old daughter and lots of people who love him. So they'll be no Heath-bashing here! If you have something mean to say about the guy, direct it at me instead. I cant take it! [WWTDD]

Whew! In lighter, sluttier news:

Here are some topless and bikini pics of Kim Kardashian! And HERE are some more! [Egotastic/HollywoodTuna]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-01-24 21:27:33 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 22 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1748353 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 17 Jan 2008 21:44:52 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1748353 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> After reading this column, you will be a Level 7 Scientologist and totally brainwashed. Sound good?

Great, then meet your leader, Jerry Maguire! A bunch of Tom Cruise videos created by the Church of Scientology have leaked on the web, and it confirms that sneaking suspicion you had that Tommy might be insane - and also the secret ruler of the earth. [IDLYITW]

Because Britney does 1048503021 insane things a week (like drive to her deposition and then not enter the court), here's what she did yesterday. I'm sure by the time you read this she'll have chartered a submarine to the core of the earth. Alas. [IDLYITW]

Brit forced the store Kitson to open at 2AM so she and her mooching friends/f*ck buddies could go shopping. She left in a men's shirt, tie and not much else. Even she's not attracted to herself. [WWTDD]

Let me get the sad stuff out of the way:
1. Actor Brad Renfro died. Possibly drugs. Definitely sad. [WWTDD]
2. Lily Allen recently suffered a miscarriage. Blergh, the poor thing. Can we even talk about anything funny after that? [DListed]

Ah yes, here we go! Britney Spears might have a multiple personality disorder! One personality is called "British Girl." And the other is know as "batshit insane white trash nastiness." [DListed]

The Adult Video News (AVN) Awards fucked the shit out of Las Vegas this weekend! [HollywoodTuna]

David Spade has probably impregnated a 22-year old Playboy model. Sorry, unborn baby. You are going to be short and annoying and not as funny as your future fat best friend friend. [CelebSlam]

Continuing on the Dudes Who Totally Should Not Be Dads tangent - Matthew McConaughey has knocked up his super-hot girlfriend. Clearly celebrities think they are above condoms. [CelebSlam]

Jessica Biel showed up back on the scene, and she's definitely left sexy at home. [Egotastic]

And finally, Lindsay Lohan - though totally jacked up botox, red bulls and dick - kinda actually looks hot again. It's gonna be a good year. [Egotastic]

Your Baby Daddy,
Kate

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-01-17 21:44:52 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 3 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1747968 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 10 Jan 2008 22:55:35 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1747968 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

If you were rich and crazy and had been all over the world, where else is there left for you to go? The mental ward of Cedars-Sinai Hospital!

You know the story, right? Britney Spears freaked and holed herself up in the bathroom with her kid when K-Fed's bodyguard came to pick them up at the end of her visit. She stayed there for hours until the cops knocked the door down and hauled her ass off to the hospital. [WWTDD]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-01-10 22:55:35 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 17 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1747604 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 03 Jan 2008 21:06:09 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1747604 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> New year, same old shizz. If you don't believe me, check this out:

Glug glug glug glug.

Yup, it's Lindsay Lohan chugging champagne on New Year's eve. I know who killed her sobriety - and her career - she did. [CelebSlam]

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-01-03 21:06:09 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 9 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1747038 Stuff You Don't Care About But Will Help You Get Laid Thu, 20 Dec 2007 23:50:41 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1747038 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Guys, seriously, if I could give you all condoms right now, I would. But please, if you have them use them, and if you don't, go run to the Health Center at school and get like, five hundred handfuls. Because pregnancy happens. Just ask Britney Spears' 16-year old sister.

OMG She's Preggers!

Jamie-Lynn Spears is knocked up, thanks to her spread legs and her 18-year old boyfriend's hearty teen sperm. Someone has finally out-trashed Britney, and it of course was her own kin. It must run in the family, ya'll!

]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/f/collegehumor.6f6731616c295187aa4d0fffdfb6fdff.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-12-20 23:50:41 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:300">Kate Spencer</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1163"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 5 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />