by Morgan Freeman
Oh. Hello there, sonny. Would you mind quickly assisting me with a glaring issue of mine? Much obliged. You would never believe how eager I currently am to have run into an individual such as yourself: an individual who may just happen to be able to be of some assistance to this particular dilemma of mine. It seems, my boy, that the hole in this Capri Sun is exasperatingly complex to penetrate.
You see... I have dealt more than several hours with attempts to release this refreshing liquid into my body. But as you can so clearly observe, this fruit drink has infuriatingly halted itself to no end.
In fact, the roof of my mouth, in its extreme state of desiccation, is dreadfully crying out for just the slimmest drop of quenching tropical fruit juice. Due to the faulty perforated hole that is normally to be pierced by the individually wrapped straw, all 6.75 fluid ounces of my liquid replenishment will remain in its default container.
Just ever so slightly out of reach.
Does every great quenching snack have its obstacles? Surely. If this here beverage weren't so delightful, it would not be worth the trouble that it is. All wise men know these 70 calories of strawberry kiwi flavor do not come without a little work, a bit of exertion.
Could I cheat and thrust the straw through the bottom of the container? I suppose that technically I could. That would mean two things: I took the ways of a weak man to solve my problem. Also, I wouldn't be able to set the drink down until I have completely finished it.
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