Cutsman: Sir, me and the other robots have been talking.

Dr. Wily: You aren't developing feelings are you? I don't have time for any Pinocchio sh*t.

Cutsman: No, no! It's just...we think you're going about this "destroy Mega Man" thing the wrong way.

Dr. Wily: How so?

Cutsman: Well, seeing as Mega Man can absord powers, maybe you should make us all the same type so he can't exploit our weaknesses.

Dr. Wily: Each of you is a unique manifestation of my evil genius.

Cutsman: You don't see anything wrong with making a "Cutsman" and a guy with rock powers?

Dr. Wily: Nope.

Cutsman: Have you ever played "Rock, Paper, Scissors?" It's like that, except with Mega Man using rock powers to kill me.

Tired of your old Photoshop filters? Adobe just released five new ones to make your life even better (or at least seem that way).

Roll over each image to see the new filters in action.

It's Halloween again, which means it's time to try and come up with some ideas for an original costume that will entertain your friends, seduce your crushes and devastate your rivals. But please, during your quest for the perfect outfit, stay away from these five costumes. Chances are, they'll be all over the place.

What better way to pay homage to Maurice Sendak's timeless work than by dressing up like the main character, getting drunk and throwing up all over yourself? With the recently-released "Wild Things" movie enjoying huge popularity, there are sure to be more than a few homemade Max/wolf costumes this year. It's easy, it's comfortable and it lets the wearer feel edgy and hip without the fear of actually alienating anyone.

Better Suggestion: Build a 12-foot animatronic "Wild Thing" puppet and pay James Gandolfini to record every possible response you would say at a party. Wear the puppet and communicate using only the pre-taped lines.

Zombie #1: BRAAAAIIINS...

Victim: AAIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE!!

Zombie #1: BRAAAAIIINS!

Zombie #2: Mark.

Zombie #1: Shhh, I'm trying to stay focused here. BRRAAAAIINNNS!!

Zombie #2: Mark that guy is getting away from us, like, really easily.

Zombie #1: Dude I know. Who would've thought a middle-aged used car salesman could suddenly turn into frickin' Usain Bolt? Usain Bolt when he was alive, I mean. Zombie Usain Bolt is slower than me somehow.

Zombie #2: But that guy's just... he's just walking briskly.

Zombie #1: I know! It's like, where's the fire, asshole? I mean, there's fires all over the place, but you know what I mean. *Sigh* C'est la vie. We'll get the next one.

Zombie #2: Mark, I've been thinking.

Zombie #1: How? Your head's barely on.

Sometimes the best costumes are already...IN. YOUR. CLOSET.

Colonel Mustard BECOMES Van Pelt.
Last year you blew all your money on a realistic Colonel Mustard costume, and you just can't use that excuse two Christmases in a row. Instead, find an even more ridiculous mustache, add a pen-tip to your hat, and go as everyone's favorite Jumanji villian Van Pelt. An old-timey musket will complete the look, so put a call in to your grandpa ASAP.

Raymond Stantz BECOMES Roger Workman.
Everyone loved your Raymond Stantz costume last year, but this year you just don't have the time to make a Proton Pack from scratch. Instead, take the Ghostbusters patches off your khaki suit and replace them with Dharma Patches. Roger Work Man may be a more obscure character choice, but your homemade Ecto-Goggles lead us to believe you're a fan of Lost as well.

After working with partners Simon Pegg and Edgar Wright to create a successful British sitcom (Spaced) and two hit feature films

(Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz), Nick Frost now appears as '60s DJ Doctor Dave in the upcoming Pirate Radio. He's also a charming, soft-spoken Brit, and I encourage you to read this interview with his voice in your head.

Your character in this film, Dave, could be quite the sexual role model for full-figured men.

I think I'm going to be asked to appear on the cover of "All American Bear".  It's pretty brave of Richard (Curtis, the director) to cast a 20 stone man in a romantic role. It's not everyday you get to just wander around naked and people don't give a sh*t.

Tom Sturridge (the film's lead) said the one scene he'd always remember was being naked with you in a tiny boat bathroom.

If you had to show an alien race how different the human form can be I think Tom would be at one end and I'd be at the other. If you get the Blu-Ray version and pause, you will see a sliver of nut. Two hands couldn't contain my range.

This film is a love letter to 1960s rock. Were you familiar with the era's music?

Growing up, my big love was house music. I was 15 or 16, going to raves and not going to school like naughty boy. In the first week of the film, I said to Richard, "I've never listened to a Rolling Stones record, don't tell anyone." And he immediately told Bill Nighy - he's a massive Stones nut - and Bill told me off for 5 minutes.

As the authors of such seminal columns as "Cars Crashing Through Walls in Sitcoms" and "The Ten Grossest Hollywood Thumbs-Into-Eyes," we end up at Wikipedia a lot. Sometimes you want to research one thing, perhaps a rogue intergalactic smuggler, but for some reason Wikipedia sends you to an article about something with the same name that's significantly less important. Here are five egregious examples we've come across in our travels.


SHOULD BE: Star Wars character and space scoundrel Han Solo
IS: Species of trilobite Han solo

Type the name of the universe's most famous Nerf Herder and you won't be whisked to a galaxy far, far away, but to Chinese rock formations where the slug-like trilobite Han solo can be found in fossil form. It's surprising that George Lucas, who's spent the last 20 years systematically tailoring every last insignificant detail of his Trilogy with CGI, hasn't logged a complaint on the Wikipedia discussion forums. Perhaps he's relying on fans to correct the error - a mistake, since all the truly passionate Star Wars fans go straight to Wookiepedia.

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SHOULD BE: Oregon Trail the computer game
IS: Oregon Trail the trail

There was a time when entertainment meant picking something from three networks, four radio stations, or, God forbid, reading a book. Everyone enjoyed everything, because there was so little to enjoy. However, once we discovered the Internet, we divided ourselves into sub-sub-genres and take pride in enjoying things other people haven't discovered yet. We no longer share anything -- most people don't enjoy either America's most popular song or our #1 TV show, much less both (Jay Sean's "Down"and Mark Harmon's "NCIS," respectively). What's the one thing we all still have in common? The educational computer game Oregon Trail. It's been around since 1974, which is earlier than most people believe computers were invented. Not everyone in the 1800s decided to adventure West, but everyone born since 1980 has at some point sat down to play this game. That's why, somehow, Oregon Trail the computer game is more important than the historical events on which it is based.

You may have been too falling in love with Topanga Lawrence to notice, but 90's TV was weird, man. Here's a brief review of five sitcom sidekicks that truly out-weirded the rest.


1. Sam Anders, "Clarissa Explains it All"

In case you haven't bought the complete box series to watch regularly, Sam Anders was Clarissa's best friend and neighbor. The quintessential laid back surfer/skater dude, Sam was the perfect balance to Clarissa's dramatic and saracastic personality. So what's so weird about this kid? Sam wasn't the overcomfortable friend who comes into your house through the garage. He wasn't even the Urkle-esque neighbor who just pops open the back door to say hello. This audacious bastard routinely CLIMBED into a 15 year old girl's bedroom through a ladder he strategically kept against up to her window. Where the hell were the parents on that one? Did they not foresee any issues with other strange men climbing through that window? And most importantly, why did this show win an Emmy?

Signing up for a club this semester? Make sure you know what you're really joining. Roll-over these Club Fair posters to see what's really going on.

 

Wikipedia is a wonderful place to share information. It's also a wonderful place for immature people to call things they hate "gay." Few things are as universally hated as Nickelback, so we had our interns scour their Wikipedia history to find every instance of vandalizism. We've compiled the results into one big Nickelback-bashing video.

Click Keep Reading to check it out! Warning: As you can imagine, it's full of curse words, homophobia and racial slurs. Surprise.

I like Zombieland. A lot. It's funny, it's bloody, it's got the celebrity cameo of the century and I'd love to make a movie just as awesome someday. It was obvious I had to interview the director, Ruben Fleischer. Not just because our "Rubens" are spelled the same.

OH. In case you haven't seen the movie yet (big mistake), don't read the last question. DON'T WORRY. If that's too confusing, just stay away from anything labeled: **SPOILER ALERT**. 

In the event of an actual zombie invasion, who would you risk you life to save? Woody Harrelson, Abigail Breslin, Jesse Eisenberg, or Emma Stone? In other words, who do you like more?

I don't think Woody would need my help, I think he'd be alright on his own. I'd probably go after Abby. I couldn't let the 12 year old get eaten. Morally I would feel wrong about that. I'd probably have to help out the 12 year old. The rest of them can fend for themselves.

There were so many graphic deaths in Zombieland, like the seatbelt scene with the mom crashing out the window (which you mentioned was one of your favorites), Woody bashing a zombie's brains in with a bat... HOW DID YOU DO IT?

The seatbelt one was a composite where we did the car accident in one shot and the woman being ratcheted against the green screen and landing on her face on a pad. Then we composited her on the car accident and put in some CG glass and some CG beanie babies. As far as the baseball bat to the face, it's a pretty clever trick where you'd have like a half of a baseball bat, so Woody's holding (just) the handle. We used it for the toilet seat lid. Jesse just had half of (it). That way they can swing it that much closer to the person's head and then you extend the end of it with CG. It lets the actors hold onto something that's real.

Things look a little different when you're in college...

Learning a language, exploring new cultures, and broadening one's horizons are all really boring reasons to study abroad. Roll-over to see what students really expect overseas.

For more funny video game articles, check out GamerPaper.com.