Contributions

• Wrote an article on Sunday, Jul 13

  Snippets Of Dialogue From Reality Shows If I Became Producer And Made Them Better

  John: You know, when I signed up for this show, I was kinda expecting to be paired up with another woman...Eric: Well, Tim and I were married in Massachusetts, and we are legal spouses.John: Right...Eric: ...John: I'm going to go drink a lot.Eric:...

  6 likes | 4 Comments

• Wrote an article on Monday, Jun 9

  Brainstorming Successors For 'Perhaps The Best Picture On CollegeHumor'

  Two girls, tops off, making out on a keg full of marijuana, in front of a rock band playing in the background on top of a mountain in Hell.Dozens of people running around naked while dinosaurs wage an apocalyptic battle with laser beams attached...

  2 likes | 2 Comments

• Wrote an article on Thursday, May 22

  Comedy Central Schedules Their Lineup For The Month Of May

  (Three executives in a small boardroom at Viacom headquarters)Executive 1: Okay, so, new episodes of Reno 911?Executive 2: Those should be ready by the end of the month, yeah.Exec 1: Right, I think that just about covers everything.Executive 3:...

  4 likes | 4 Comments

• Wrote an article on Thursday, May 8

  Dr. Pepper Reveals The Secret 23 Flavors

  1. Cherry2. Artificial cherry3. Vanilla4. Cola5. Granny Smith apple6. Grandpa Smith apple7. Grandpa Smith's Adam's apple8. Rhinoceros meat9. Rhinoceros horn10. Rhinoceros urine11. Rhinoceros urine after an unnecessary dialysis session12. Jesus...

  2 likes | 3 Comments

• Wrote an article on Monday, May 5

  Futurism: 2016

  37 likes | 53 Comments

Activity

• Liked an article on Thursday, Jul 17

  The Dark Knight IMDb Trivia

  319 likes | 89 Comments

• Liked a video on Tuesday, Jun 24

  Seven Words

  Comedy legend George Carlin died last night at the age of 71. Here he is performing his famous,...

  
  2333 likes | 174 Comments

• Liked an article on Tuesday, Jun 24

  Why The Superman/Batman Movie Will Never Happen

  *Fade in on the Gotham City Police Department. Batman addresses Commissioner Jim Gordon and his officers.* Batman: There's no time to waste. Two-Face is holding the Second National Bank hostage, and we-*Superman bursts in.*Superman: Yo, Bruce-man,...

  312 likes | 97 Comments

• Commented on a article on Wednesday, Jun 11

  The Librarianist

  1) Either a) the driver of the car at the center of attention is driving in the wrong lane, meaning the driver is probably old, Asian, or a woman, b) this cartoon is of the famed Backwards Street in Philadelphia, or c) all lanes have been redirected to the same direction for evacuation of the city. This is unlikely, because, given the extent of the cloud cover, the hurricane and/or aliens are already here. 2) The driver in question chooses a bumper sticker that says, "I think people care what I think," which is true for most bumper sticker owners. 3) The driver in question believes that he is witty and funny, much like The Librarianist. Art imitates life much? 4) The car on the right is either a Toyota Yaris, or it is partially melted. The left rear tire is also in need of repair.
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• Commented on a article on Saturday, Jun 7

  The Librarianist

  1) Why is the mother wearing a hood indoors? 2) Big Bird's menu is much tinier than everyone else's. 3) How could a couple that appear to be no taller than 5'2 and 5'6 produce such giant offspring? 4) It's nice to see the parents have gotten over whatever genetic deficiencies that caused their (presumptively) first-born child to be a freak bird-man, allowing them to give birth to a normal human child the second time around, while at the same time being able to accept their eldest son for his differences (superficially at the very least, as it's unclear whether they still harbor intense disdain for the boy, but those feelings, if they exist, are clearly repressed). 5) I'm going to assume, for continuity's sake, that the father is Charlie Bird, the Irish journalist, and the mother is Florence Bird, the Canadian Senator (this cartoon takes place between 1992 and 1998, before Senator Bird's death at the age of 80). 6) Tim Bierbaum has broken at least 6 rules of perspective and vanishing points in this week's cartoon alone.
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