CollegeHumor: Stuff Tim Sanchez, VP of Sales Likes

5 Star Wars Status Updates

Mon, 23 Nov 2009 18:00:00 -0500

<table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> _________________________________________________________________________________________

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1648824"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/a/collegehumor.3fc86fae9d1470ed6013e7fafc3e1807.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-11-23 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1648824">Brian Murphy</a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1611 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

Getcha free babies. Free babies here! Get 'em while they're hot.

Fri, 13 Nov 2009 22:49:00 -0500

<table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1927079"><img src="http://8.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/3/1/collegehumor.8cf41b438f56c7673710ff7107326189.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1755630">Allyson</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:177"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 69 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

Drunk-O-Vision IX

Fri, 13 Nov 2009 16:00:00 -0500

Sober :: Drunk

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/a/collegehumor.7d8b975affed1e53fc3e6afa6f0a2364.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-11-13 16:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239">Streeter Seidell</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:271"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 751 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

Seth MacFarlane's Secret

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 11:00:00 -0500

<table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1924513"><img src="http://8.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/c/3/collegehumor.d352b43c74ce4178d1f6a8f31c5b618f.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:21877">CH Staff</a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 872 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

He's not wrong

Sat, 07 Nov 2009 08:00:06 -0500

Social Hierarchy Org Charts Through The Years

Tue, 03 Nov 2009 18:00:00 -0500

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-11-03 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1565 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

New Sim On the Block

Fri, 30 Oct 2009 14:00:00 -0400

Bill: Hello, new acquaintance.

Dave: Hey, neighbor, can I ask you something?

Bill: City hall. Rain cloud. Dollar sign.

Dave: Um, yeah. Listen, I really need a friend. My boss says I can't get promoted until I get one and learn something about cooking. Life in politics is not what I imagined.

Bill: Soccer ball. Earth. Ghost!

Dave: Uh...huh.

Bill: I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM!

Pause.

Dave: So....you watch any sports or anything?

Bill: Backrub?

Dave: Um, no thanks. I only ask because my TV only gets four channels, and they all speak this non-sense jibberish language. It's so weird.

Bill: Backrub?

Dave: Uh, still no, thanks.

Bill: Tickle!

Dave: Haaaa...very funny. That was not at all awkward.

Bill: We're friends now.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1549923"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/d/8/collegehumor.6eb639fd06721655a3e45cf8154fb0a4.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-10-30 14:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1549923">Andrew B.</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:156"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 380 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

Prank Backfired

Fri, 29 Dec 2006 15:20:10 -0500

<table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1733379"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/2/collegehumor.77340e51914b73ef40a426621776e083.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 2879 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

College Obituaries

Thu, 22 Oct 2009 17:00:00 -0400

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/8/collegehumor.06098b8bb7a6234c386249d817f7bddb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-10-22 17:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1657072">Conor McKeon</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:529"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 278 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

Dating, It's Complicated: Issue #23

Thu, 22 Oct 2009 16:00:00 -0400

<table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Dating someone? Well great! Send your craziest, funniest, most embarrassing dating related stories to me at dating.itscomplicated[at]gmail.com!

Yesterday afternoon when I was having sex with my girlfriend, she abruptly stopped and remained quiet - with a very serious look on her face. When I asked her what was wrong, she quickly replied, "I think my strawberry crops withered..." She was talking about her Farmville on Facebook. She left the bed and went to get her laptop, she never came back.
-Anonymous

My ex-girlfriend's favorite band was Nickelback...
-Dan, UTK.

I went with my (now ex) girlfriend to a Coinstar machine. It's one of those things where you dump in coins and it gives you a check for the amount so you don't have to count them out and roll them. On the side of the machine it says that the fee is 9 cents for every dollar of coins you put in. I commented how that was a rip off. She replied word for word. "Yeah. 9 cents for every dollar, that's like twenty percent!" She's trying to get into grad school....
-Paul, BSU

My Girlfriend was watching Saturday Night Live online and stopped it to ask me "When does SNL come out on T.V?"
-Anonymous

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1171873"><img src="http://6.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/4/7/collegehumor.34fb0a748e9767bd8891bea7cfb6f87d.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-10-22 16:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1171873">Jason Michaels</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1146"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 134 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

The Legend of Link's Distractions

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 11:00:00 -0400

<table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1923420"><img src="http://4.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/0/collegehumor.a51554de7bf3aadea36f0510b95832e3.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:21877">CH Staff</a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1309 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

This is a very respectable entry into the "Internet Burn Hall of Fame."

Sat, 10 Oct 2009 17:44:00 -0400

<table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1921549"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/f/e/collegehumor.72b23e8f724b75b3f34be8de7d805f2e.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1376 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

Derek Jeter upstages A-Rod grand slam with 5-run home run

Sat, 10 Oct 2009 08:00:05 -0400

Cyber Sex Mishap

Fri, 09 Oct 2009 16:00:00 -0400

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:326"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/c/9/collegehumor.45397a4c6c8241522ef776b95348cf0f.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-10-09 16:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:326">Jeff Rosenberg</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1236"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 800 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

Look at this picture!

Sat, 27 Oct 2007 20:22:00 -0400

<table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1782677"><img src="http://6.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/c/7/collegehumor.d82b817cb5700d92b28372179b46843b.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:492561">Lisa</a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 425 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

"Hampshire police thought it would be a good idea to advertise on the rear of a bus. Their planning did not take into account the position of the exhaust pipe."

Sun, 28 Oct 2007 17:20:00 -0400

<table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1782770"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/c/collegehumor.e73a32eb78328ba29cc5b01c961c9987.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 115 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

Good advice, wrong problem.

Sun, 21 Oct 2007 02:06:00 -0400

<table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1781082"><img src="http://6.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/c/d/collegehumor.cfd6267cd464d4e38f45eabdf4eadd6a.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:101960">Matt</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:217"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 725 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

1337 Boyfriend

Wed, 23 Sep 2009 18:00:00 -0400

His dream girl.

David: Taunt dude! You're supposed to be the tank!

Zach: Just back up, you're drawing agro.

David: I can't, I'm-

Cheryl: *opening the door* David...?

David: Oh sh*t!

Cheryl: Discarded pizza rolls, empty Mountain Dew bottles...What's going on here?

David: We were...I was...fixing Zach's computer!

Cheryl: Liar! *starts bawling* You're having a LAN party aren't you!?

David: You weren't supposed to see this! You aren't supposed to be home for another three hours!

Zach: I should leave.

David: No, you know what? I'm done hiding.

Cheryl: *crying* You told me you were watching football.

David: Zach and I are in love! With Warcraft.

Cheryl: What's next, David? Painting Warhammer figures? Magic The Gathering? You're a child.

Zach: Magic is a complex game of strategy! It's not for kids!

Cheryl: You stay out of this! You...you...virgin loser!

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1648824"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/a/collegehumor.3fc86fae9d1470ed6013e7fafc3e1807.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-09-23 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1648824">Brian Murphy</a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 267 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

They'll never know I buried my bone here...

Mon, 22 Oct 2007 11:04:00 -0400

<table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1781315"><img src="http://6.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/c/5/collegehumor.c6a1631caea4bf98f486e375f28098fd.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:7981">Lyndi</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:532"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 309 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />

FML: Both Sides Of The Story

Tue, 22 Sep 2009 18:00:00 -0400

<table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> .fml_container {background:#EBF3FF;"Lucida Grande","Lucida Sans Unicode",Verdana,Arial,sans-serif; font-size:13px; padding:5px 0}.fml {margin:10px; -moz-border-radius:8px; background:#ffffff; padding:8px; border-bottom:5px solid #fff}.fml p {color:#444444; }.fml small {color:#808080;}.fml small .fml_blue {color:#0062BD}.fml_container hr.fml_divider_black {border:15px solid #ffffff;}.fml_container hr.fml_divider{background:#ffffff; height:5px; margin:0 -10px; border:none;}

Everyone said the hot English teacher was a bitch, but I took her anyway. Our first week of class, she assigned a 12 page paper. It's due tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks (17543) - you totally deserve it (9865)
On 9/3/2009 at 4:23pm - misc - by straight effed - United States (Maine)

I asked my students to write a short essay on Hawthorne. Well turns out I wrote "6000 words" instead of "600". Hello 300 extra pages of reading this weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks (6234) - you totally deserve it (23865)
On 09/4/2009 at 11:23am - misc. - by schooled - United States (Maine)

This girl I really like finally invited me to her house for a party. I spent all Saturday getting ready but when I got there, the house was empty. The party was Friday night. FML

I agree, your life sucks (24920) - you totally deserve it (5106)
On 08/30/2009 at 12:30am - misc. - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

My parents left for the weekend, so I spent $200 on a party for my entire class. The only one who showed up was this creepy kid who keeps a picture of me in his locker. I told him it was the wrong night just so he'd leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks (15901) - you totally deserve it (8791)
On 8/31/2009 at 1:23pm - misc. - by pissedoff - United States (Virginia)

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:34106"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/e/collegehumor.19dc6c6166e28b864a1f0ece84a80bf0.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-09-22 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:34106">Ben Joseph</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1236"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 966 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />