CollegeHumor: Comments by Paul Frank http://www.collegehumor.com http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1705592 An Open Letter to the Woman in the Girls Gone Wild Commercial Wed, 13 Sep 2006 18:23:50 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1705592 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
I am writing to you in regards to the other night. As I'm sure you remember, it was a weekend; I was tired from my full week of classes and was lying on my couch watching a baseball game with my good friend named Beer. After a tremendous battle which took extra innings to settle, I was enjoying an old George Carlin stand-up comedy special and that's when I met you roughly seven times in nearly an hour.

It may have been the fact there was no one else in the room with me, but nonetheless I was rendered completely speechless. As soon as I saw you lift up your tank top to reveal the bold red and white font saying "UNCENSORED," I just knew I had to have you.
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:311"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/2/collegehumor.9457d5b2b882a218aa7f8ff222c62b4b.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:311">Jake Klocksien</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:265"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 15 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917368 Untopical Man on the Street: Bruno Mon, 20 Jul 2009 12:43:13 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917368 Untopical Man on the Street: Bruno nonadult comedy Find out what real people think about Sacha Baron Cohen's controversial new movie, Borat. sketch comedy, gil ozeri, untopical man on the street, interview, bruno, borat <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917368"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/4/collegehumor.c1f781cbf75fb39db31798a4af884c75.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 28 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917368 Untopical Man on the Street: Bruno Mon, 20 Jul 2009 12:43:13 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917368 Untopical Man on the Street: Bruno nonadult comedy Find out what real people think about Sacha Baron Cohen's controversial new movie, Borat. sketch comedy, gil ozeri, untopical man on the street, interview, bruno, borat <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917368"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/4/collegehumor.c1f781cbf75fb39db31798a4af884c75.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 28 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917106 Jake and Amir: Wake Up Thu, 16 Jul 2009 14:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917106 Jake and Amir: Wake Up nonadult comedy I work hard, I sleep harder. jake and amir, ch originals, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917106"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/5/f/collegehumor.542ec5f55244bab14114505f1ffdb5bd.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1835268">Jake and Amir</a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 620 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1772812 6 Friends You Kinda Hate Mon, 30 Mar 2009 18:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1772812 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> The Lame Couple

Individually, they're both awesome people who were friends with you pre-relationship. But when their powers combine, they form a crappy Megazord of lameness. Remember the guy who was always down for a game of tackle football? He watches "Grey's Anatomy" every week. Remember the girl you introduced him to? The one you were friends with before he even knew she existed? She hasn't spoken to you in months. Despite whatever friendship you may have had, she's been demoted to "friend's girlfriend" status; which means she sees you as competition for her boyfriend's time. Now whenever you're with him, he's got to leave early to fulfill his daily quota of "sitting around and being boring with his girl." And whenever you're with her- Wait, you're never with her. She decided you aren't friends anymore.
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1648824"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/a/collegehumor.3fc86fae9d1470ed6013e7fafc3e1807.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-03-30 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1648824">Brian Murphy</a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 670 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1755286 We Have A Winner! Thu, 15 May 2008 00:58:46 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1755286 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Congratulations, Alison!
You're America's Hottest College Girl, 2008




Alison isn't the only one taking home some money. Our Fantasy Bracket Winner this year is Jose Silva-Rivas. For being able to most accurately choose which girls were the most attractive we're giving Jose 1,000 dollars and a date with the winner, Alison.

Okay, wait. Alison said no. But that's still cool, with 1,000 bucks you can probably figure something else out.
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:21877"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/4/5/collegehumor.410f4f84538571c78218e93585c6a5bb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:21877">CH Staff</a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 34 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1814563 There Will Be Blood Rough Cut Mon, 05 May 2008 10:31:37 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1814563 There Will Be Blood Rough Cut nonadult comedy That's Richard Lewis's corpse. Movies, There Will Be Blood, Curb Your Enthusiasm, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1814563"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/5/collegehumor.ac38ccc17c720b0423da53653626b481.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 51 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1752452 Caption Contest: Week of 3/31 Fri, 04 Apr 2008 12:45:06 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1752452 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

RULES: Leave your one best entry as a comment, not a reply. Winner, as chosen by a poll next week, gets a BustedTee. Hit the keep reading for last week's picture and nominees...

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:128053"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/e/collegehumor.e6ecc1ea45a24925c0772a0ee94f48a6.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-04-04 12:45:06 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:128053">Doug Kellner</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:553"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 15 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1752452 Caption Contest: Week of 3/31 Fri, 04 Apr 2008 12:45:06 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1752452 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

RULES: Leave your one best entry as a comment, not a reply. Winner, as chosen by a poll next week, gets a BustedTee. Hit the keep reading for last week's picture and nominees...

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:128053"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/e/collegehumor.e6ecc1ea45a24925c0772a0ee94f48a6.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-04-04 12:45:06 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:128053">Doug Kellner</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:553"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 15 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1808382 Hardly Working: You'll Never Guess Tue, 25 Mar 2008 12:45:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1808382 Hardly Working: You'll Never Guess nonadult comedy You'll never guess what happens in this video. CH Originals, hardly working, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1808382"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/2/collegehumor.e96b0f0a5641f1c9c28493c23a53246e.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 994 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1794219 Hardly Working: Nut Tappers! Mon, 17 Dec 2007 17:45:29 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1794219 Hardly Working: Nut Tappers! nonadult comedy CollegeHumor's first TOTALLY AWESOME PRANK SHOW!!! CH Originals, ouch, hardly working, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1794219"><img src="http://2.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/7/4/collegehumor.b486aef723fe1dcada910e04cdb166cd.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1483 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1787590 Cingular Aids Tue, 06 Nov 2007 01:03:12 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1787590 Cingular Aids nonadult comedy My friend and I decided to make a parody of the AT&T/Cingular commercials. <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1787590"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/8/6/collegehumor.7d5912a8567a1334226bbce660229413.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1325914">Nic</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:76"></a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1 like </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1742594 Insensitive Guy at an Intervention Tue, 16 Oct 2007 11:36:36 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1742594 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> A small group of friends and family stand around a kitchen in an apartment talking.

Tom: I hope Mike appreciates what we're doing for him.
Scott: I think even if he doesn't appreciate it now, he will understand eventually.
Ellen: Oh my God you guys. Look who's here!
Tom: Phil? Oh no. Who invited him?

Phil approaches Tom, Scott, and Ellen.

Phil: Oh man, it's been a while. Ellen you're looking hot.
Ellen: Hi Phil.
Phil: I mean...hot considering you just had a kid. I mean seriously can I park my car on those stretch marks? Zing.
Scott: Phil, what are you doing here?
Phil: Oh man, quite the welcome committee over here. I'll let it slide since I know you're probably still sore over the time I banged your little sister.
Scott: What? You know my little sister died in a tragic car accident.
Phil: Oh it was way before that, I swear. Zing! Listen, is there any food here? Someone said there would be food.
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:356"><img src="http://6.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/0/d/collegehumor.e464c2c03ccab951de6330bd6e59b571.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-10-16 11:36:36 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:356">Neil Padover</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:540"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 60 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1741255 Great Military Blunders of the Galactic Empire Tue, 25 Sep 2007 21:02:35 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1741255 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Darth Vader's tyrannical Empire struck fear into an entire galaxy. Sadly, his fleet was also behind some embarrassingly ill-planned military ventures. Reviewing early Imperial schematics, the Sith Lord himself expressed serious doubts about his soldiers' tactical choices...
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:101226"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/b/collegehumor.bf47a312f8c3b3d327c1333b4268bdca.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-09-25 21:02:35 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:101226">Patrick Cassels</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:857"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 217 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1741255 Great Military Blunders of the Galactic Empire Tue, 25 Sep 2007 21:02:35 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1741255 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Darth Vader's tyrannical Empire struck fear into an entire galaxy. Sadly, his fleet was also behind some embarrassingly ill-planned military ventures. Reviewing early Imperial schematics, the Sith Lord himself expressed serious doubts about his soldiers' tactical choices...
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:101226"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/b/collegehumor.bf47a312f8c3b3d327c1333b4268bdca.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-09-25 21:02:35 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:101226">Patrick Cassels</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:857"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 217 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1740353 Know Your College Bar Employee Wed, 12 Sep 2007 00:12:01 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1740353 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
Hot Girl Bartender


"Hey there. What can I get for ya, hunny? See how I called you 'hunny'? That’s just my way of pretending to flirt with you so that you’ll tip a little extra in case you weren’t going to already on account of my superb breasts."



Douchebag Bartender

"Sup Chief? I’m calling you Chief so that you realize that I’m talking down to you. What do you need? No problem, boss; I’ll grab it after I finish flirting with Hot Girl Bartender."





Intoxicated Bartender


"Wanna know one of the perks of this job? Free fuggin’ drinksksks!!"

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:311"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/2/collegehumor.9457d5b2b882a218aa7f8ff222c62b4b.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:311">Jake Klocksien</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:265"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 6 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1776136 Hardly Working: Something to Hide Tue, 18 Sep 2007 13:55:07 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1776136 Hardly Working: Something to Hide nonadult comedy The story of an innocent man with nothing to hide. Nothing at all. Just give him a sec, cool? hardly working, CH Originals, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1776136"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/5/3/collegehumor.7fdfb8252a06f0417f39f623a2a0952d.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 402 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:116428 26 girls times multiplied by two boobies a piece. You do the math. Sat, 12 Feb 2005 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:116428 26 girls times multiplied by two boobies a piece. You do the math. adult comedy 26 girls times multiplied by two boobies a piece. You do the math. boobies, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:116428"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/default/collegehumor.r.31.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 172 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:116428 26 girls times multiplied by two boobies a piece. You do the math. Sat, 12 Feb 2005 00:00:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:116428 26 girls times multiplied by two boobies a piece. You do the math. adult comedy 26 girls times multiplied by two boobies a piece. You do the math. boobies, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:116428"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/default/collegehumor.r.31.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 172 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1743784 Wrong! I masturbated BEFORE I came to Taco Bell, as I always do. Tue, 27 Feb 2007 11:04:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1743784 Wrong! I masturbated BEFORE I came to Taco Bell, as I always do. nonadult comedy Wrong! I masturbated BEFORE I came to Taco Bell, as I always do. masturbation, taco bell, sauce packet, fortune cookie, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1743784"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/6/2/collegehumor.042042f611e8819550913392165f8e4c.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 130 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />