CollegeHumor: Comments by Adam http://www.collegehumor.com http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789446 Who's Bringing the Microwave? Fri, 07 Aug 2009 16:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789446 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:326"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/c/9/collegehumor.45397a4c6c8241522ef776b95348cf0f.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-08-07 16:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:326">Jeff Rosenberg</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1236"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1653 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789446 Who's Bringing the Microwave? Fri, 07 Aug 2009 16:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789446 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:326"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/c/9/collegehumor.45397a4c6c8241522ef776b95348cf0f.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-08-07 16:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:326">Jeff Rosenberg</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1236"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1653 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789121 Batman 3 Rumors and News Thu, 06 Aug 2009 17:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789121 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1549923"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/d/8/collegehumor.6eb639fd06721655a3e45cf8154fb0a4.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-08-06 17:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1549923">Andrew B.</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:156"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 42 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789043 Guy Plays '20 Questions' with His Girlfriend Tue, 04 Aug 2009 14:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1789043 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Guy: Ok, you got it?

Girlfriend: Yea.

Guy: Ok, is it big?

Girlfriend: No.

Guy: Are you sure? I mean; it's relatively big, right?

Girlfriend: No, it's about the same size as all the others.

Guy: So it's above average?

Girlfriend: No. It's smaller.

Guy: What!? How many have you seen?

Girlfriend: I've pretty much seen every kind.

Guy: Oh my god! You slut.

Girlfriend: What?

Guy: The one you're thinking of is the best you've seen though, right?

Girlfriend: I like it the best.

Guy: Alright, that's a relief.

Girlfriend: Some people have better though.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:950169"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/4/1/collegehumor.7987165490e4937047f60b511ab726d2.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-08-04 14:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:950169">Adam</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:31"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 51 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917694 Hardly Working: Camouflage Mon, 03 Aug 2009 14:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917694 Hardly Working: Camouflage nonadult comedy Sometimes it feels like people are looking right through you. ch originals, hardly working, camouflage, invisible, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917694"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/3/7/collegehumor.5d6188d3801fa147577d3b37db5151fe.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:21877">CH Staff</a> </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1097 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788720 Talkin' to Strangers! Thu, 30 Jul 2009 15:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788720 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> So, you and your roommates get along fine, you don't have a job or a girlfriend, and you pray every night for the opportunity to become a legend by sending a story to a submission-based column?

Well, all your prayers have been answered! Last night, Tupac came to me in a dream and said, "Adam, I want you to start a submission-based column. I want this column to feature the witty and slightly uncomfortable conversations that people have had while using that somewhat sketchy website, Omegle."

For those of you that don't know, Omegle is a site that lets you anonymously talk to and insult strangers.

For those of you that do know, send those random conversations to IveBeenTalkingToStrangers [at] gmail.com

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:950169"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/4/1/collegehumor.7987165490e4937047f60b511ab726d2.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-07-30 15:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:950169">Adam</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:31"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 4 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788720 Talkin' to Strangers! Thu, 30 Jul 2009 15:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788720 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> So, you and your roommates get along fine, you don't have a job or a girlfriend, and you pray every night for the opportunity to become a legend by sending a story to a submission-based column?

Well, all your prayers have been answered! Last night, Tupac came to me in a dream and said, "Adam, I want you to start a submission-based column. I want this column to feature the witty and slightly uncomfortable conversations that people have had while using that somewhat sketchy website, Omegle."

For those of you that don't know, Omegle is a site that lets you anonymously talk to and insult strangers.

For those of you that do know, send those random conversations to IveBeenTalkingToStrangers [at] gmail.com

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:950169"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/4/1/collegehumor.7987165490e4937047f60b511ab726d2.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-07-30 15:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:950169">Adam</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:31"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 4 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788720 Talkin' to Strangers! Thu, 30 Jul 2009 15:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788720 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> So, you and your roommates get along fine, you don't have a job or a girlfriend, and you pray every night for the opportunity to become a legend by sending a story to a submission-based column?

Well, all your prayers have been answered! Last night, Tupac came to me in a dream and said, "Adam, I want you to start a submission-based column. I want this column to feature the witty and slightly uncomfortable conversations that people have had while using that somewhat sketchy website, Omegle."

For those of you that don't know, Omegle is a site that lets you anonymously talk to and insult strangers.

For those of you that do know, send those random conversations to IveBeenTalkingToStrangers [at] gmail.com

View Article
]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:950169"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/4/1/collegehumor.7987165490e4937047f60b511ab726d2.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-07-30 15:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:950169">Adam</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:31"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 4 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788835 5 Literal Movie Posters Mon, 27 Jul 2009 18:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788835 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
Showgirls:

Int: Showgirls Strip Club. A sexy cowgirl finishes her lasso routine.

DJ: All right, fellas, give one last yippee-kai-yay to Veronica!

Customers: Wooo!

DJ: Next up we have.... we have... oh no, oh jesus god no, not again... ahem, I said, next up we have the slim and sexy Cassandra!

Cassandra enters.

Customers: (screams, gagging noises)

DJ:Cassandra is 20 years old and her hobbies include being the only one-legged, no-armed stripper at Showgirls. She's all woman, folks. Well... actually, she's like... thirty-five percent of a woman, but what parts of her the sharks didn't take off are still... are still... please, I don't want to read this...

Customer 1: I think I'm going to throw up.

Customer 2: You just threw up!

Customer 1: I think I'm going to throw up forever.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1747720"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/c/b/collegehumor.688014cc4e3f51335e8cf30b65685d54.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-07-27 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1747720">Owen Parsons</a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 256 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788529 What You're Saying With Your Drink Order Mon, 27 Jul 2009 15:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788529 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Budweiser, Miller, or Coors
Guys: They don't have kegs at this bar? What kind of low-brow place is this?
Guys buying it for girls: I don't celebrate anniversaries, I don't care about your friends, and as soon as you expect commitment, I will drop you. May as well get used to it.
Girls: Does drinking cheap beer make me look sexy and tomboyish?

Sam Adams, Honey Brown, or Pete's Wicked
Guys: I bet this beer tastes good because it costs more.
Guys buying it for girls: Work study? Hah! That's for suckers. I've got a swanky internship paying me $10 an hour!
Girls: Drinking cheap beer makes me look too tomboyish. Does drinking expensive beer make me look sexy?

Guinness
Guys: I don't intend to get drunk tonight. Thankfully, this beer takes a half hour to finish.
Guys buying it for girls: I don't want you to leave this bar for the next half hour.
Girls: I hope I'm not hung over during rugby tomorrow.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:225"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/f/6/collegehumor.ad937b4f074bca543727e036e28b33e7.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-07-27 15:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:225">Steve Hofstetter</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:53"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 59 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468 Never Ending Volleyball Rally Tue, 21 Jul 2009 17:18:19 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468 Never Ending Volleyball Rally nonadult comedy If the teams were any better it never would have ended. They'd still be playing. volleyball, forever, sports, endless, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/b/collegehumor.ef226e523f8524f83b8272bb64b8c92e.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 174 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468 Never Ending Volleyball Rally Tue, 21 Jul 2009 17:18:19 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468 Never Ending Volleyball Rally nonadult comedy If the teams were any better it never would have ended. They'd still be playing. volleyball, forever, sports, endless, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/b/collegehumor.ef226e523f8524f83b8272bb64b8c92e.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 174 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468 Never Ending Volleyball Rally Tue, 21 Jul 2009 17:18:19 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468 Never Ending Volleyball Rally nonadult comedy If the teams were any better it never would have ended. They'd still be playing. volleyball, forever, sports, endless, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/b/collegehumor.ef226e523f8524f83b8272bb64b8c92e.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 174 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468 Never Ending Volleyball Rally Tue, 21 Jul 2009 17:18:19 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468 Never Ending Volleyball Rally nonadult comedy If the teams were any better it never would have ended. They'd still be playing. volleyball, forever, sports, endless, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/b/collegehumor.ef226e523f8524f83b8272bb64b8c92e.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 174 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468 Never Ending Volleyball Rally Tue, 21 Jul 2009 17:18:19 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468 Never Ending Volleyball Rally nonadult comedy If the teams were any better it never would have ended. They'd still be playing. volleyball, forever, sports, endless, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/b/collegehumor.ef226e523f8524f83b8272bb64b8c92e.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 174 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468 Never Ending Volleyball Rally Tue, 21 Jul 2009 17:18:19 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468 Never Ending Volleyball Rally nonadult comedy If the teams were any better it never would have ended. They'd still be playing. volleyball, forever, sports, endless, <table><tr><td> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1917468"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/b/collegehumor.ef226e523f8524f83b8272bb64b8c92e.png"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> <p>Uploaded </p> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 174 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788346 The Different Underground College Cults and the Pros and Cons of Joining Them Thu, 23 Jul 2009 15:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788346 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> The Vampire Cult: This cult, by definition, means that they only meet at night. (citation needed) They all wear black clothing with black eyeliner. The cult has a big economic gap straight down the middle, which is easily observable. The rich ones wear black leather while the poor ones look like bus boys. Pros: All the red juice you'll ever want. Cons: The more involved you are the more nocturnal you become.

The Parkour Cult: Parkour, or Free-Running, is a cult that generally only meets at night and then just runs around doing flips and handstands on park benches and slow moving people. Pros: You'll get in shape really fast. Cons: Cramps, sprained ankles, shin splints, and countless groin injuries will all most likely occur, plus if you fall they keep running without you. They stop for no man.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:950169"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/4/1/collegehumor.7987165490e4937047f60b511ab726d2.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-07-23 15:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:950169">Adam</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:31"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 16 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788140 4 Things to Stop Doing By Now Mon, 20 Jul 2009 15:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1788140 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> With the recent Harry Potter movie release, I learned a lot about my fellow students/generation/people-I've-added-on-Facebook-but-barely-know.  Mostly things I wish I didn't know.  The following are things that you should no longer be doing at this stage in your life.

Dressing up in a costume for an event that does not require a costume

"We are so ready to see this movie now!"

This obviously doesn't apply during Halloween or any themed parties.  But when you decide that it will be a good idea to put on a robe, wizard hat, and bring a wand with you to go see a movie, you are crossing the line.  This was great when you were a little kid and you and all your friends got together to do it, but that's just it, you were a little kid.  Now when you do this, it looks like you and your friends are just going to be fulfilling your fetishes.  And it's not like anyone can really see your costume.  You will be sitting in a dark theater, and the only person who will notice it is the guy behind you trying to look around your wizard hat.  The only other people who will see it are the people you are waiting in a line with hours before it shows at midnight.
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1869908"><img src="http://2.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/0/f/collegehumor.1592ead03d42cd13bce4e24fcb8bbcd0.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-07-20 15:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1869908">Jimmy Breaker</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:166"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 22 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1777917 Paul McCartney Checks His Email Wed, 17 Jun 2009 17:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1777917 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/a/collegehumor.7d8b975affed1e53fc3e6afa6f0a2364.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-06-17 17:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239">Streeter Seidell</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:271"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 38 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1776518 6 Movies a Tough Guy Cried During and His Totally Manly Justifications Tue, 02 Jun 2009 17:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1776518 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>




Uh, hell yeah I cried during "Rocky." Am I ashamed of it? No. He's like, the American dream personified. So if you think I'm a pussy for loving Rocky, then you hate America. Way to hate freedom, dick. What are you, French or something? Way to be French, Frenchy.




_____________________________________________________________________________






Sometimes I get choked up when I'm proud. So what? If you didn't tear up when little Rudy made that tackle, then maybe YOU'RE the one with the problem. You probably just don't like football. Pansy. You think you can look down on me for shedding a VERY SMALL tear during a totally MANLY film when you don't even like football? I'll kick your ass. You probably like soccer or something.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1648824"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/e/a/collegehumor.3fc86fae9d1470ed6013e7fafc3e1807.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-06-02 17:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1648824">Brian Murphy</a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 53 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />