I was having sex with my girlfriend with the movie gladiator playing quietly in the background. She finished right before the epic scene which prompted me to raise my arms and yell "ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED!?"
after 12 years of friendship, scott has a secret to tell the guys
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Roommate Confessions: The Hypocrite
Revenge is a dish best reheated in the microwave.
Very Mary-Kate: Raise Your Hand
I can't raise my hand. I'm allergic to effort.
Brunchables
The kids' snack so hip you'll need reservations.
Best of Dorkly: Smash Bros. Fatalities
The ESRB may have to reevaluate their rating.
Jake and Amir: Cheryl
My sister from another mister.
Jake and Amir: Texting
Write it. Don't fight it.



Fixed it!
The kind of sports you can expect to see on ESPN17
Oh good, my package came. I've got a big night ahead of me.
And that's why you always leave a note
Siri, what is the temperature... because I just got burned!
Pfft I listened to polka covers of arena rock before it was cool
Forever a zone
The other side of Adele's story
Spending your Valentine's Day on the internet? This will make everything better.
Thoughts on Valentine's Day from people who are paid to be cynical bastards.