A couple of months ago my boyfriend wanted to have sex but I was tired, so I closed my legs and said, "You shall not pass." Last night at dinner my hand was moving over his leg and moved to his crotch. He grabbed my wrist and said, "One does not simply walk into Mordor." Touche, David, touche.
If he were a South American soccer player, he'd be shot by now.
Topics
Sports
basketball
Like this Video
Save Greendale (with the cast of Community)
These human beings are proud to be Human Beings.
Your Six Christmas Movies
Fast forward to the presents
North Korean Photoshop Tutorial
There's no crime against humanity a spot brush can't fix.
Jake and Amir: Parkour
Can you freestyle walk the walk?
Jake and Amir: Thanksgiving Feast
Turkey dinner tonight?
Jake and Amir: Texting
Write it. Don't fight it.
Valentine's Day was simpler back then. And creepier.
Hey! Get your real world out of my internet!
These guys are getting called out by the reeferee.
Scarlett Johansson in a bikini -- I'd try to describe it but something would get lost in translation
"mirror... MIRROR!" - The Joker, also this guy.
This guy is #1
Hot athletic girls working a pole
Put that English degree to work over-analyzing beloved children's entertainment.
A good resource if you base you fantasy football team on great hair.
