A serious film deserves serious promotion.
By Josh Ruben and Patrick Cassels
A CLIP FROM "TREE OF LIFE" BRAD PITT There are two ways through life. The way of nature and the way of grace. NARRATOR (VO) (serious trailer guy) If you see one movie this year, see Tree of Life. And when you do... (suddenly upbeat, young) be sure to enter the Tree of Life "What's Your Tree?" contest! INT. MOVIE THEATER COMMERCIAL MUSIC plays. A hip GUY and GIRL buy two sodas. NARRATOR (VO) Check under the bottle cap of participating soft drinks and you could win a Tree of LifeTIME of prizes! Guy turns over a CAP. Under it is a stencil of Jessica Chastain. Beneath it, a code: 0000234923 NARRATOR (VO) If you have the winning code, you could win one of five holographic Terrence Malick trading cards! HANDS turn and "whip" over many caps. One reads "WINNER!" FIVE HOLOGRAPHIC CARDS magically "pop" up against the backdrop of outer space. CLIP FROM TREE OF LIFE BOY (whispered) Father. Mother. Always you wrestle inside me. MOVIE CONCESSION STAND, BOY (CONT'D) (whispered) Buy any snack bar combo meal and get a free nachos. GLAMOR SHOT of nachos in a Tree of Life-themed box. TREE OF LIFE - A BABY RUNNING THROUGH A LIVING ROOM. STOCK FOOTAGE OF FRENCH FRIES being poured into containers intercut with gorgeous footage of outer space, volcanoes, and Jessica Chastain spinning around in the grass. NARRATOR (VO) Buy a jumbo fries at participating fast food restaurants and we'll compare the anatomy of space and time with that of a deteriorating family dynamic and the notion that despite death and hardship, life goes on! A DUDE shoves ketchup-y fries into his mouth. DUDE Mmmmmm! NARRATOR It took Terrence Malick 10 years to write the movie, but it only takes you 10 seconds to play the Tree of Life scratch off game! Uncover three siblings and you'll get a walk-on role in Terrence Malick's next film in about 25 years. TREE OF LIFE - KIDS LAUGHING IN A FIELD. TREE OF LIFE - BRAD PITT RUSHES OUT THE DOOR NARRATOR (VO) Does your dad love you?!... BRAD PITT Your mother's naive. It takes fierce will to get ahead in this world. NARRATOR (VO) ...Find out at Tree of Life Contest dot com back-slash What's Your Tree slash Does My Dad Love Me dot com! TREE OF LIFE - THE MOM HUGS HER KIDS MOM Unless you love, your life will flash by. NARRATOR (VO) That reminds me! The first 25,000 visitors get exclusive access to the Tree of Life flash game! A really bad FLASH GAME. The SON tries to hit his dad. With each punch, a puny "pew pew!" FLASH ANIMATION BRAD PITT (robotic and awful) Hit me son. Hit me son. Hit me son. INT. LIVING ROOM A KID sits on his MOTHER's lap, plays the flash game. KID Got 'em! NARRATOR (VO) Grand prize winners will receive a Kia Spectra, $200 in cash, the chance to walk on a beach with everyone you've ever loved forever, and a Blu-Ray Player. The DUDE watches a stupid action movie on Blu-Ray. DUDE I'm in heaven! ESTABLISHING STOCK FOOTAGE OF A THEME PARK NARRATOR (VO) And the fun doesn't stop there! If you loved the movie you'll love Tree of Life The Ride at Universal Studios, Orlando. An ENTHUSIASTIC CROWD of 20-SOMETHINGS! JERRY I really felt Brad Pitt reach across the table and grab me! MARY I didn't get the whole Sean Penn part, but whatever. It had dinosaurs! EVERYONE We survived the TREE OF LIFE! NARRATOR (VO) Be a part of this existential experience! If you're the first to ride without walking out halfway through, you and a lucky friend could become Sean Penn! STOCK FOOTAGE OF SEAN PENN trying to find words: "Uhh..." TREE OF LIFE - Sean Penn dropping to his knees. NARRATOR (VO) The Tree of Life What's Your Tree Contest. Many will enter. Few will win! TREE OF LIFE SCORE swells. TREE OF LIFE - BRAD PITT GIVES HIS SON A PIGGYBACK RIDE NARRATOR (VO) What's YOUR tree? END.