Dinosaur Office: Buyout (Part 1)

By

Kevin Corrigan, Caldwell Tanner & Brian Murphy

          INT. DINOSAUR OFFICE - TERRY'S OFFICE

          CRAIG, RICHARD, TODD, SHEILA and INTERN sit lined up. TERRY
          is at the front of the room. An easel in the front has the
          Dinosoft Limited logo on display.

                              TERRY
                    Everyone, I've got some exciting
                    news. The company has been sold.

                              EVERYONE
                    Oh no! / Redundancies! / My 401k!

                              TERRY
                    Don't worry. As long as I'm here,
                    your jobs are safe. In fact some of
                    you may even end up in management.

          Terry winks at Craig. Craig gets excited.

                              TERRY
                    Now please welcome your new CEO,
                    Bruce Velosi.

          C.U. on the door handle. It opens a la the kitchen raptor
          scene in Jurassic Park. Enter BRUCE wearing a slick suit
          with slick black hair. He draws a big X over the Dinosoft
          logo.

                              BRUCE
                    The company is dead, people.

          Everyone gasps.

                              BRUCE
                    All these years you've been working
                    at Dinosoft Limited.

          Bruce rips the logo page from the easel, revealing a line
          graph. It reads "Dinosoft Limited: Possibilities", the line
          extends to the top of the chart.

                              BRUCE
                    Welcome to Dinosoft Unlimited.
                    Where the possibilities have no
                    limits.

          He rips the page off, revealing another chart. It reads
          "Dinosoft Unlimited: Possibilities". It's the same as the
          first chart, but has no top and the line extends to the top
          of the page. Bruce pulls a handful of glitter from his
          pocket and lazily throws it. Dinos ooo and clap.

                              BRUCE
                    Any questions?

                              SHEILA
                    Will you keep bran muffin Tuesdays?

                              BRUCE
                    No. Try bran muffin every days.

          Murmurs and excitement.

                              CRAIG
                    What's your policy on Hawaiian
                    shirt day?

                              BRUCE
                    My policy is "Aloha!"

          More excitement, and murmurs.

                              INTERN
                    What are your long-term goals?

                              BRUCE
                    Excellent question...

          Bruce whips him with his tail, he flies out the window.

                              BRUCE
                    ..for a nerd. I've been the CEO of
                    10 different companies this
                    quarter, and I didn't do it by
                    thinking about the future. Any more
                    right now questions?

                              RICHARD
                    Hi, I'm Richard. I work here. Will
                    there be opportunities for
                    advancement at Dinosoft Unlimited?

                              BRUCE
                    You tell me, new general manager.

                              RICHARD
                    Wow! Thanks Dad!

                              BRUCE
                    Not your dad.

          Craig looks concerned.

                              TERRY
                    Actually Bruce, I'm the general
                    manager.

                              BRUCE
                    Not anymore. I just fired you.

                              TERRY
                    I understand.

          Terry picks up a plant, cries and smashes through the wall.

          Two-shot: Richard leans over to Craig. Bruce drones in
          background.

                              RICHARD
                    What a meeting, hey Craig-o? You
                    got Hawaiian shirt day, and I'm
                    everyone's boss now.

                              CRAIG
                         (through gritted teeth)
                    Yes. That was unexpected.

                              RICHARD
                    I know! Here I was thinking you'd
                    be my boss someday because you're
                    so much more qualified! I gotta
                    call my wife and tell her the good
                    news.

          Beat.

                              RICHARD
                    Do you know how to use a phone?

          Terry crashes back in through the wall, still crying. He
          gathers things from his desk in a box and crashes back out.

          TITLE CARD: TO BE CONTINUED