Dinosaur Office: The Presentation (Part 3)

By

Kevin Corrigan, Brian Murphy and Caldwell Tanner

          TITLE CARD: PREVIOUSLY ON DINOSAUR OFFICE

                              SHEILA (V.O.)
                    Previously on Dinosaur Office.

          INT. OFFICE (RECAP!)

          A series of quick cuts.

                              BRUCE
                    I'm the new CEO and I'm ruining the
                    company to get rich.

                              CRAIG
                    I'm gonna give a power point
                    presentation to change his mind.

                              TODD
                    I never got the bran muffins I was
                    promised.

          INT. TERRY'S OFFICE

          CRAIG stands in front of the room. He wears a full suit.
          TODD, RICHARD, SHEILA, DANIELLE, and INTERN are seated.
          BRUCE watches from the desk. Craig fumbles with a laptop.

                              TODD
                    Are you using the proper VGA cable?

                              CRAIG
                    Yes, Todd.

                              SHEILA
                    Try pressing F7.

                              CRAIG
                         (unrelated)
                    Oh, there it goes. I wasn't in
                    slideshow mode.

          Craig adjusts stuff. A projection shows up on the wall. The
          first frame slides in from the left. All frames have cheesy
          power-point transitions. Cheesy music plays throughout.
          First frame reads "Craig's Big Presentation Title Page".
          Craig wears a Hawaiian shirt in every picture.

                              CRAIG
                    Mr. Velosi, you're about to
                    sacrifice this company to make a
                    quick buck at your employees'
                    expense. You're making a big
                    mistake.

          Second slide: Office exterior, Craig is waving.

                              CRAIG
                    Dinosoft is more than just a
                    company. It's a reason to get out
                    of bed in the morning.

          Slide: Craig and Todd laughing in front of the watercooler.

                              CRAIG
                    It's hilarious water-cooler
                    observations. Here's Todd telling
                    me how he feels about gas prices.

                              TODD
                    They're outrageous.

          Slide: Sheila, Craig and Richard shocked in front of a
          computer.

                              CRAIG
                    It's thought-provoking chain
                    emails. This one explains how
                    climate trends predict a
                    catastrophic ice age.

                              RICHARD
                    It's true! I read it on the
                    Internet.

          Slide: Sheila wears a racing bib and desperately tries to
          escape a stampede.

                              CRAIG
                    It's donating to your coworker's 5k
                    charity stampede.

                              SHEILA
                    I've never been so afraid.

          Slide: "In conclusion!" real cheesy gradient font in space.

                              CRAIG
                    In conclusion, Mr. Velosi, you can
                    work these Dinos until they're
                    extinct, but you'll never be rich
                    without friendship.

          Slide: Craig, Todd, Sheila and Richard are at Craig's
          cubicle, smiling.

          Beat. Richard, sobbing, starts a slow clap. Everyone joins
          in, including Craig, to form a smattering of applause.
          Richard starts all out bawling and clapping. Bruce stands
          up, everyone quiets.

                              BRUCE
                    Wow. Great work Craig, that was
                    terrawful. I had to make a new word
                    for how bad it was.

          Everyone gasps. General despair. Sheila consoles Craig.

                              BRUCE
                    I was going to sell the company,
                    but you've convinced me that it's
                    completely worthless. I'm outta
                    here.

                              RICHARD
                    Does this mean we can keep our
                    jobs?

                              BRUCE
                    I don't care, do whatever you-

          TERRY, with scruffy beard, bursts through the wall and
          devours Bruce.

                              TERRY
                    I did it! I saved the company!

                              TODD
                    Actually, Bruce just quit.

                              SHEILA
                    All thanks to Craig's presentation!

                              RICHARD
                         (Singing)
                    For he's a jolly-good Craig-O...

                              EVERYONE
                    For he's a jolly good Craig-O, For
                    he's a jolly good Craig-Ooooo

                              SHEILA
                    Which nobody can deny.

          Craig smiles, proud of himself.