Adam Ruins Everything
Jake and Amir
14 Charmers Who Know Exactly How to Hit on Women
November 16, 2017
We don't know about you guys, but we're absolutely FLUSHED after reading these riveting pick-up lines.
They kind of read like a modern day John Keats but the instead of there being an "Ode to a Nightingale" it's more like an "Ode to my Boner".
Honestly, just glad to see that the age of Romance is having a real renaissance.
1. It's good he cares about dental hygiene.
2. You might want to see a doctor about all these symptoms.
3. Glad you figured that one out, friend.
4. *Slathers on makeup like garlic around a vampire*
5. I'd like to pump my fist into your face and the dump you on the side of a highway.
6. Oh, oh no thank you.
7. What an interesting perspective to have.
8. Wow, you must love your sister!
10. No, no it's not.
11. You had me at "I usually don't find women funny".
12. Pretty sure Ted Bundy is back from the dead and hitting up Twitter.
13. How about we don't and never speak again.
14. I'd like a million bees to fly up your urethra.
We like you. Do you like us too?
Don't ask me again.