"Staff Jokes - October 12, 2012" by CH Staff

This is the most popular Mitt Romney has been since he played JD McCoy's dad on Friday Night Lights.
— Jeff Rubin (@JeffRubinShow) October 10, 2012

Life's a funny thing. One day you're on top of the world, and the next you're dead from frostbite.
— Alex Watt (@AlexanderWatt) October 9, 2012

If I were the kind of girl who dated Brads, I'd sing "b-b-b-Brad to the bone" when he got an erection. Then he'd dump me.
— Hallie Cantor (@halliecantor) October 11, 2012

Pussy Riot getting sent to a penal colony has got to be the saddest thing that's ever made 3rd graders laugh. #Pussy #Penal
— Alex Schmidt (@AlexSchmidty) October 10, 2012

cast of arrested development reunited for wildly successful tumblr posts. "a whole bunch of reblogs" brags creator mitchell hurwitz.
— AndBOO! Bridgman (@AndyBridgman) October 5, 2012

The act of monarchs having sex is also known as "poking some heir holes."
— Mike Trapp (@MikeWTrapp) October 9, 2012

I just put a whole plate of honey-glazed firecracker wings under my pillow. Hoping to get a visit from my Fieri Godmother tonight.
— H. Ghoulwell Terror(@caldy) October 8, 2012

If you have a baby because everyone else is doing it, then that's not your baby.
— Kevin Corrigan (@kevincorrigan) October 11, 2012

My favorite part of the Hulk Hogan sex tape is when the Ultimate Warrior enters and everyone boos.
— Patrick Cassels (@patrick_cassels) October 6, 2012

Truly Terrifying Halloween Costume: Guy with chainsaw who doesn't murder, but does construction early in the morning near your place
— Dan Hopper (@DanHopp) October 9, 2012

BREAKING: Woman secretly filmed in #HulkHogan sex tape hospitalized with a severe case of #Hulkamania.
— Hesley Harps (@HesleyHarps) October 9, 2012

After you burp yourself, life can only get better, right?
— Kelly Hudson (@citizenhudson) October 10, 2012

How I Met Your Mother twist ending: Ted is a hermaphrodite, is also their mother.
— Matt Grote (@feMANism) October 11, 2012

Anyone know someone with like interests who can offer emotional support sometimes but mostly is just fun to chill with? Asking for a friend
— Saj Pothiawala (@sajpo) September 27, 2012

If my life flashes before my eyes when I'm dying, it's gonna be a pathetic montage of pretending to check my phone in various settings.
— Wiseguy Pictures (@WiseguyPictures) October 4, 2012

Having people over to watch TV tonight, where I'll be showing my extremely alienating New Girl/Oldboy double feature.
— Tom Philip (@tommphilip) September 28, 2012

Antisocial tip: Keep your headphones on all day and scream when talked to.
— jaredneumark (@jaredneumark) October 3, 2012

The battle-sounds fade as the Grohl now returns to his stone form. "Wake me," he rumbles, "when the Foo again threaten the realms of men."
— Owen Parsons (@owenBparsons) October 3, 2012