- I know you said that this wouldn't be included on the exam, but [INSERT ANYTHING HERE].
- Yes, but would these principles still hold true if humans existed in a vacuum in outer space and there was no such thing as linear time or reality?
- Before I jump into the recurring motifs in Emily Dickinson's poetry, can someone tell me if the tribal tattoo on my lower back looks infected?
- Is our textbook missing a chapter? I couldn't find the part where it explains that the Holocaust was all just a hilarious hoax.
- Aren't we just cheating ourselves in the long run if we all don't read The Brothers Karamazov in its native Russian?
- Could I make my final project about how all of this "Introduction to Physics" stuff is kind of like Twitter?
- This is a little off topic, but could we safely say that we have now officially entered the post-post-post-modern age?
- Would you mind elaborating a bit more on the critical response to the homosexual undercurrents of Hitchcock's earlier films? Also, what the fuck is a homosexual?
- How come we're not reading any J.K. Rowling? Isn't this Classics of American Literature?
- Just a thought, professor: what if, instead of watching the film adaptation of the book, we all read the screenplay instead? My fiancée and I found it to be much truer to the central themes of the original work. Wouldn't you agree?
- Can everyone see that I'm taking my notes on my iPad? Just wanted to make sure everyone sees that I take notes on my iPad.
- Does anyone here object if my dad and I are live vlogging this lecture?
- Do you want us to print our names on the quiz or sign them in cursive? I also have a stamp.
- Can everyone look under their desks real quick? I can't find my toenail clippings.
- Is it just me, or is this class a little, shall we say, "darker" than might be preferred?
- Could we turn off the air conditioning? Having a little trouble appreciating the natural pheromones radiating from these vivacious youngsters in here.
- Do you offer extensions for students who know they'll be pretty busy euthanizing dogs this semester?
- Am I going crazy, or is everyone in this classroom quietly imagining what it would be like to dry hump me on a pile of money right now?
- Anyone have a breast pump I can borrow?
- Why. Teacher. No. Like. Robot. Voice? Can. Not. Compute.
The Ooh Ooh, I Know! ME! I KNOW! Look at the way I'm supporting my outstretched arm with my other arm! If you don't call on me, I might die. At the very least I'm going to start whimp …
10. Making a bagel? (or any other delicious food item that is being prepared in front of you) That's right, he's making a bagel. There it is. An Everything bagel toasted and loaded with …
Professor: All right, I know I’ve been referencing the final exam for a while now, not telling you exactly what it is. But today I’m finally going to explain to everybody how the final wor …
Nobody likes people who make hollow promises, especially when their bodies are anything but hollow. Do yourself a favor, the next time you're eating a pizza and your friend complains about how ou …
While sitting in class (any class it doesn't matter) I came to the realization that I can't stand 75% of the people in the room with me. There are so many times during the day that I fe …