Rick the Stick: Amateur Porn Star/Driving Instructor

by Jason Michaels on July 16, 2008

Rick's First Prom

Rick The Stick: What's your name pretty girl?
Lisa: Lisa.
Rick The Stick: Alright Lisa. Well, we will be driving that white Yukon over there.
Lisa: Wow, that's big...
Rick The Stick: Tell me something I don't know...
*The two enter the car*
Rick The Stick: I forgot how tight this feels.
Lisa: Umm, maybe you can adjust your seat?
Rick The Stick: It's super warm, too.
Lisa: Should I put on the a/c?
Rick The Stick: Don't be silly angel. It feels good.
Lisa: ...Oh, Ok.
*Lisa turns on car*
Lisa: Alright, well I checked all my mirrors, my seat belt is fastened, I'm ready to go.
Rick The Stick: Ready to go? Already? Amateur. I could go all day... And I do.
Lisa: Huh? Ok, well I'm going to pull out of the parking lot then.
*The car pulls out onto an empty street*
Rick The Stick: Oh baby, to the right. To the right baby. Oh yeah, just like that.
Lisa: Is this good?
Rick The Stick: Yeah, keep going. Keep going. Nice.
Lisa: Faster?
Rick The Stick: Just a little.
Lisa: Good?
Rick The Stick: A little faster. Yes. Perfect. You're doing so good. Is this your first time?
Lisa: No, I've been out with my dad a few times.
Rick The Stick: You sick bitch. I love it.
Lisa: Excuse me?
Rick The Stick: Quiet. Make sure you are using your hands correctly.
Lisa: Like this?
Rick The Stick: Higher. Lower. There!
Lisa: This feels a little awkward.
Rick The Stick: That's what she said!
*Rick's cell rings*
Rick The Stick: Hey Boss? What's that? You want me to come in? Ok, I'm coming.
*Rick hangs up cell*
Lisa: We've only been doing it for like forty-five seconds.
Rick The Stick: I'm sorry, angel.
Lisa: This was hardly even worth me coming out here...
Rick The Stick: Doll, I said I'm sorry. I usually go for days.
*Rick's cell rings again*
Rick The Stick: "Boss, I said I'm coming! I am coming, sir!" I'm coming!
Lisa: This is ridiculous...
Rick The Stick: I'm com....
Lisa: ...you just jizzed your pants...
Rick The Stick: I love my job.

Jason Michaels is the Virgin Mobile summer intern. You can read his blog here.