Do we call Hilary Duff "The Duff" yet? We probably should. That way instead of wasting my time telling you about these totes hawt Hilary Duff bikini pictures, I could save myself three whole letters.
The "____" nicknames are the only cool ones, anyway; The Hoff, The Stew, The Boss, etc. Forget this J-Lo/Speidi nonsense. Everyone should be referred to by the first syllable of their last name.
Think about it: If I hadn't used nicknames, I would have filled this whole thing with pointless drivel!