Sources indicate that local father Dan McCarthy is unable to make time for his son, the adorable nine year-old Brady McCarthy.“I called Dad last week to see if we could play catch,” Brady said in a press release.“I left a message with his secretary.”Brady added, “He still has yet to call me back.”

Mr. McCarthy’s secretary, Anne Gaines, observed, “This kid Brady keeps calling me.At first I had no clue who he was, because I had never heard about him or seen any pictures of him.But I figured it out and now we talk almost every day.”Gaines noted, “Brady seems like a nice, sweet, genuine kid.Yesterday he asked me if I wanted to play catch with him.I told him I couldn’t, because I was a woman.But I thought it was nice of him to ask.”

Brady spends his days throwing a baseball at a wall and hoping that it will bounce back to him.“It’s just not fair,” he added.“But the way my bedtime schedule works, I am never awake when my father gets home.And on weekends he is always busy doing important things.I thought maybe if I scheduled in advance we could work something out.But it looks as though that is not going to happen.”

Brady’s mother noted, “I’m worried that Brady is missing a father figure in his life.He almost seems uncertain as to who his father really is.Last week the mailman called him ‘son’ and he got very confused.”Mrs. McCarthy continued, “I’ve been trying to introduce him to positive male role models, including a fireman, a policeman, a sailor, and an Indian chief.But he hasn’t really taken to them."

Brady’s maternal grandfather, Andrea Grimes, was outspoken in her frustration with Mr. McCarthy.“I keep calling that deadbeat son-in-law of mine and telling him, ‘You better go throw some balls to your son or I’ll come over there and throw some balls at you.And they’ll be hard balls, like they made back in the olden days.’”Grimes sighed.“Now he’s started screening my calls.”Added Grimes, “I want my grandson to have a father so that he doesn’t turn grow up to be one of those weirdos.”

Brady’s father, a high-powered executive, was not available for comment.