Dudes Would Go To More Theater If:

  • There was a halftime show involving Indiana Jones reenactments
  • The seats were bleachers
  • Beauty and the Breast
  • The only taps in the place were ones that dispensed beer.
  • At the end of every play, one of the actors was declared the winner.
  • For an extra $20, one of the chorus girls would give you a lap dance.
  • Keg standing ovations.
  • Sound design included more subwoofers, lighting design included pyrotechnics.
  • All Broadway shows were based on Monty Python films.
  • Kanye West Side Story