Big news everybody, Screech has a sex tape coming out. It's called "Saved By The Smell" and it's currently being shopped around to Larry Flynt and Vivid Video. Luckily for you guys, we got an advanced copy, and these are the highlites:

  • 02:41 – An unseen audience reacts to the moment of penetration with an "ooooooooooooooooh."
  • 03:14 – Dustin's voice cracks while ordering one of the girls to lick him "crack to sack."
  • 10:01 – Before performing fellatio on him, Dustin orders girl #2 place a picture of Lark Vorheeves over her face with the mouth hole cut out.
  • 14:22 – Screech demands one of the girls call him Belding. When she reluctantly agrees, he slaps her across the face and tells her she has a month's worth of Saturday detentions.
  • 22:21 – On the urging of Mark Paul Gosselaar, Dustin concocts a series of zany lies to explain his inability to maintain an erection. As his wacky cover story begins to spin out of control, he eventually contradicts himself and the farce is exposed.
  • 25:15 One of the girls asks if they can do it to the rhythm of Zack Attack's "Friend's Forever." Dustin angrily reminds her that he's Dustin Diamond, not Screech. Resentfully, he agrees.
  • 28:52 – Through a series of comic mishaps Dustin discovers an abandoned radio station hidden behind the wall of his bedroom. He begins to broadcast audio clips of his sexual exploits to the consternation of Dennis Haskins.
  • 32:23 – Mark Paul Gosselaar enters the frame, makes a "T" with his hand and calls "Time Out." Time freezes while he muses on the various humorous aspects of seeing his pal's penis.
  • 33:02 – Screech attempts a sexual maneuver called the "Schlosky Bishop Block." It is unclear whether he is successful.
  • 35:49 Kevin the robot gets in on the action. His participation comes to an abrupt end when he confuses one of the girls with math homework, leading to hilarious consequences.
  • 38:22 – Leah Remini shows up very briefly.
  • 40:03 – They go to a college dorm room and everybody stops watching.