What did you say?I sort of just shrugged it off. I was already hella late for work and I sort of wanted to get out of there. The studio has a pretty creepy vibe. They shuffle the defendant and plaintiff out of separate entrances, I guess to avoid ECW-style brawling around the building. But they made everything seem a lot more serious than it could possibly ever be on that show. It's a really tense vibe.
How so?I'm actually certain they consider themselves to be a real court. The producers make you sign a million forms about how legally binding everything on their show is. They ran down the judge's entire judicial history for me. I believe the speech ended with, "So you know, this is a REAL big deal." Which isn't the best prefix for, "So now we're going to send you to makeup."
What was the best part of appearing on the People's Court?I think seeing the video on websites and reading comments from people talking about what a total gaywad and/or idiot I am. I'm constantly saying, "You've got my number, BoratPwns244."
What brought you to the show in the first place?Well, I work for a bike shop up here in New York called NYCeWheels. I'm the shipper/receiver. We had a customer who allegedly came into the show a lot and checked out our stuff, but I had never seen or heard of him. To make a long story shorter, he bought a lemon of an electric bike from a stranger and badly wanted us to fix it. We couldn't because it was so hideously ancient. So he had a bitch fit and refused to pick it up. I told him we'd junk it if he didn't come. He didn't, so I threw it out. So he took us to People's Court.
Who are your all-time top 3 moustaches?
1) Burt Reynolds2) Big Bully Busick3) that one straight dude in Husker Du
What's next?I'm hoping to ride this out as far as possible. I'd like to only hang out with other internet celebrities. I want to get married to the Grape Fall Lady and I want Afro Ninja to be my best man. I want to not know anyone I know now in one year. Money and fame absolutely must change me completely.
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