This is a sample of a North Korean Choose-Your-Own-Adventure style book smuggled out of the country and translated. 



You wake invigorated with energy you are happy to devote to the Dear Leader. You are very hungry. Do you:

A) Have breakfast. (go to page 2)
B) Pay homage to the Great Leader and Eternal President. (go to page 3)


You are selfish and hungry. You decide to eat quickly, like American swine. Stop reading and call this phone number (110) 2234932.


You stand and show your loyalty to the Great Leader watching over his people, Kim Il Sung. You feel refreshed and ready to continue your day. The weather is nice outside, thanks to the Dear Leader, and you say goodbye to your family and head to work.

On your way to the military facility you hear an explosion. It is the blood-drinking Americans bombing us again! They have finally arrived to eat our children and enslave the population. You recall The Great Leader repeatedly said there would be days like this. A terrible thought enters your inferior mind.

"It would be easiest to surrender, accept defeat, and live the remainder of my life in one of their prison-camps on the moon."

Do you:

A) Decide to surrender to the Americans. (go to page 4)
B) Decide not to fight. (go to page 5)
C) Decide to fight to the death for the freedom of the Dear Leader, Kim Jung Il, who's birth on a mountaintop was foretold by a swallow and an extra star in the heavens. (go to page 6)


You choose to side with the Americans and accept defeat. You and your family spend the rest of your days working in prison camps on the moon, editing and writing Hollywood films. Stop reading and dial this number (110) 2234932. Ask for Moon-Yung at Camp 22.


You choose not to fight, like an imperial coward. Since you do not think highly of armed conflict, have the closest person shoot you in the right arm. Discontinue reading.


You choose glory for yourself, your family, and the Dear Leader. The Americans are soon easily defeated by the vast People's Army led by the Supreme Commander. You feel silly and petty for doubting the superiority, in every way, of North Korea. Shoot yourself in the left arm for your infidelity.

Congratulations, you win at reading!