I am off early this week to head to Beantown to celebrate Jesus' resurrection, so I'm givin' you the abridged gossip scoop this week. But I promise, it'll be short and super skanky! Just like that outfit you're wearing to Easter dinner.

1. Audrina Patridge of The Hills (the brown-haired one) is even boring while nude. But at least she's nude! [WWTDD]

2. Our favorite hooker, Ashley Alexandra Dupre, was about to be offered $1 million from Girls Gone Wild to do dirty things, but it turns out she already did 'em for the video company on her 18th birthday. [IDLYITW]

3. Are these pics of Charlotte from Sex and the City giving head? Or is it just some trashy look-a-like. Either way, BJ pics await you. NSFWork, School, Children, Adults, Pets. [Egotastic]

4. Hillary Duff realizes that she hasn't made a movie/album/crappy perfume in a few years, breaks out whore-ish outfit. [HollywoodTuna]

5. Paul McCartney's crazy-ass ex-wife just won a bunch of his money – $50 mill! – but lost her dignity in the process. But hey, at least she got that $60,000 for horseback riding that she so desperately needed. [CelebSlam]

6. And finally, here is your daily naked Amy Winehouse pic. [DListed]

Happy Fuckin' Easter!