Forgive me father, for I have sinned. It's confession time, and it's been a while for some of you. Here's a few of the best and worse from around the globe. Send your Famous Roommate Confession to FamousRoommateConfessions@gmail.com and remember, he's not allowed to get mad if he already put on the socks.
Pierre, Art Institute of Arles
So my roommate a few years was so high and mighty, always walking around like he was the king of kings. He also had the most annoying girlfriend, who was a total whore. Whenever she would come over he would steal all my bottled water and turn it into wine, then they would pass out while listening to gospel music on full blast. So that spring I found out that the police were looking for him, something to do with taxes and impersonating a king, so I told them where to find him. After they came and got him I never really saw him again, except for 3 days later I could have sworn I saw him talking to Mary.
Judas, University of Jerusalem
I used to live with this guy named John who was in the same theater company as me. He was an okay guy, except when it came to the topic of slavery and the confederacy. Like whenever we partied he would go on and on about how the Union guys are all fags that sit around all day blowing each other and that it was "Secession or bust!" One night he was really messed up, so a bunch of us players decided it would be funny to make him think we were all going to conspire to kill the president, since he was planning to come to a show at Ford's Theatre, where we all worked. He was so stoked that we "finally saw it his way!" So the next day we're all "ready to go shoot the president" and we even told him we'd have a "getaway horse" outside for him after he did it. So the whole ordeal unfolds and my roommate ends up getting chased into the next state and shot in the neck and dies. Haha I guess my mom was right all along, it's all fun and games until someone gets hurt. Oh well, dude was a douchebag anyways.
David Herold, School not given
We had this roommate Joan when we were studying abroad in France who was ridiculously butch. She was so bad that she would scare away all the guys we brought back to the apartment. So we started to sneak into her room at night and pretend to be god talking to her in her dreams and leaving little post-it notes with messages to her signed from god. The stupid bitch actually started to believe god was talking to her and that she was the savior of the country. Her parents took her out of school after she started to demand audiences with the king. Last thing I heard she had gone off and joined the army or something.
Brittney, SUNY Albany
Everyone thinks my roommate is buried under Giants Stadium, when we actually left him in a dumpster behind a Chili's in Chattanooga. Idiots.
Anonymous, Teamsters University