If you've seen Entourage you know that a lot more goes through an actor's mind when choosing a movie than just whether or not it has a good script and a good director. Sometimes, extraneous factors camouflage a script's flaws and a director's weaknesses. As with most things in life, the source of this confusion is most often women. Listed are the top 10 movie roles taken by actors who were blinded by the opportunity to make-out with the female lead. Seriously. The only conceivable reason to take these roles was to make out on screen and hit that sweet va-j off of it.

10) Aaron Eckhart in No Reservations (Catherine Zeta-Jones)

Aaron Eckhart only had one lead role (Thank You For Smoking) under his belt when he was cast in a romantic comedy about a pretentious chef (Zeta-Jones) who is forced to raise her niece after her sister dies in an accident. Eckhart plays the smarmy sous-chef who defrosts the bitter Zeta-Jones. After seeing him in Dark Knight it seems laughable that he would take this role, but I'm sure he was looking for his big break, so I'll give him a slight pass.



9) Russell Crowe in A Good Year (Marion Cotillard)

What could possibly make the same man who played Maximus, Jim Nash, and Jim Braddock take a role about falling in love over a glass of wine in the French countryside? Only a girl. They are not to be trusted.

 

 

 




8) John Cusack in Must Love Dogs (Diane Lane)

Here's one thing you need to know about me: I f*cking love Diane Lane, and therefore I would never fault anyone for taking an opportunity to make-out with her. But seriously, John Cusack? You were in Say Anything, so I know you know how to recognize a good love story when you see one. But online dating, dog parks, and trailer homes are three things that should not be grouped together.

 



7) Charlie Sheen in Good Advice (Denise Richards, Angie Harmon)

Some of you may think Charlie Sheen has no business being on a list of serious actors who made bad career moves, but I would dare to disagree. A lead role in Platoon and two fantastic supporting roles in Ferris Bueler's Day Off and Major League, plus a famous father and brother help cement Sheen as a leading man candidate. Unsurprisingly, however, Sheen's fledgling star power wasn't strong enough to support a premise where he jokingly takes over an advice column when his journalist girlfriend goes on vacation. He begins to take it seriously, and then gets in touch with his feminine side. Think: What Women Want, without the anti-Semitic undertones.



6) Ben Affleck in Daredevil (Jennifer Garner)

I tried to avoid this pick for two reasons. 1) Obviously Ben Affleck has become somewhat of a laughing stock in Hollywood. But after Good Will Hunting, Boiler Room, and a fantastic cameo in Shakespeare in Love, Affleck was officially a leading man and had a lot to lose by making poor career choices. Ironically, it was at this time that Mr. A-ffleck happened to make all of his poor career choices. 2) I think every guy has a fantasy of being a superhero, which would detract from the point of this article: to choose movies where the lead actor only agreed to perform in order to fulfill some kind of fantasy to make out with the lead actress. However, due to a current relationship with Ms. Garner, I think my argument is valid. Also, I don't care how bad you want to be a superhero; this movie f*cking sucked.


5) Nicolas Cage in Ghost Rider (Eva Mendes)

*Read the last sentence of number 6.

 

 

 


 

 



4) Matthew McConaughey in Fool's Gold (Kate Hudson)

No, I don't really consider Mr. McConaughey a serious actor. In fact, he's a pretty well established chick flick star after EdTV, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, The Wedding Planner, and Failure to Launch, but McConaughey has that Reign of Fire potential. That essence that so few men have, the je ne sais crois ability to blow some sh*t up and be believable doing it, so for him to keep doing this sh*t is especially disappointing, even if he does get to make out with Kate Hudson.



3) Kevin Costner in Rumor Has It (Jennifer Aniston)

Costner has two movies (Bull Durham, No Way Out) on RottenTomatoes that have gotten a 100%. The man had a ridiculous amount of star power. Furthermore, for his entire career Costner has done approximately one movie per year, and had never more than two. In 2005, however, the year this gem was released, he was already acting in one (The Upside of Anger) and narrating a documentary (Ever Again). There is only one thing that I can think of for Mr. Costner to put his body through that kind of strain. (It's vagina).

 



2) Ben Affleck in Gigli (Jennifer Lopez)
Once I decided to include Daredevil, well, this was a foregone conclusion. You really can't say anything bad about this movie that hasn't already been said, so I won't try.

 


 

 



1) Tom Cruise in Vanilla Sky (Cameron Diaz, Penelope Cruz)

This movie had everything: An actor in his prime who was never really the same after the movie, not one but two hot actresses, a script that literally made no f*cking sense, and a real-life romance between the stars once the movie wrapped up. And THAT is why a bromance is the only productive relationship in life. Wait, no…kind of, whatevs, I know I'm not gay so I don't care if you think I am. But seriously, guys, I'm not gay.




Honorable Mention: Nic Cage and Jessica Biel in
Next, Clive Owen and Angelina Jolie in Beyond Borders