Aerosmith = I wish you were as hot as Liv Tyler

Josh Groban = I'm actually gay

Journey = Journey fucking rocks

Billy Joel = my mom loves this song

The Police = I'm watching you through your window as you listen to this

Sir Mix-a-Lot = two words: Jenny. Craig.

Pink = I'm totally whipped

ZZ Top = please shave your disgusting upper-lip hair

N'Sync = I'm well aware that you picture me as Justin Timberlake when we have sex

Boys II Men = I masturbate to your facebook pictures

James Taylor = my dad said this song worked for him

Rihanna = you love to dance to this song with your annoying friends

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory = I have weird sexual fetishes