Time: Hello.
Therapist: Hello. Make yourself comfortable. It has been so long since I've seen you.
Time: (Solemnly) Has it? (Pause). It's all the same to me.
Therapist: How are you?
Time: Confused. People blame me for their problems. People ignore me. They let me slip away.
Therapist: Well you know that you cannot worry about things that you cannot control.
Time: I know. But it's like they always want what they can't have! I'm so sick of being taken for granted. I'm just like, I'm here , I'm with you, I'm patient, I'm consistent!! Why can't you just accept me?
Therapist: (nodding).
Time: People just use me. Yeah. That is how I feel- used. And I'm worried that the friendship between me and my best bro genetics is almost donezo. Me and genetics go way back, as far as I can remember. But now people are trying to fight the natural progression of aging and this has taken a toll on the quality of our relationship. We're just not as tight as we used to be.
Therapist: Have you tried to call genetics.
Time: Were not on a phone call basis really. You know, we're both conceptual. It would be awkward to talk about my feelings with him.
Therapist: I don't really know, but…How's management?
Time: He's always working. Late nights. I mean, yeah, years ago when we got married I was so excited to finally be part of a union. I would always doodle time management in a notebook. I thought our love would last forever. Both figuratively and literally of course.
Therapist: Yes. I remember you told me he sang "you are always on my side" to the tune of The Rolling Stones song about you. Great tune.
Time: Yes. It was lovely. I've done The Stones some solids in my day, so they wrote me a song. To have management sing it to me…the world stopped. But…I'm afraid he's looking for a relationship that is purely physical, and therefore not with me.
Therapists: Hmmm.
Time: You know, with all the hot young day planners, agenda's, Blackberrys, calendars around. He's reducing himself to the lowest common denominator, he is becoming superficial. As well, management is terrible with finances. He has no concept of monetary value lately. He's also been drinking heavily.
Therapist: Well, looks like the session is over. It's time to go, uh, time. Will the $150.00 be in cash?
Time: Sheeesh. Well I'm low on cash, so I will in fact give you the greatest gift of all: me.
Therapist: No offense, but I need something more substantial. Time doesn't exactly pay my bills.
Time: I see. YOU need something more substantial. And what is it you offer your patients? What exactly do I get for my $150.00?
Therapist: Your paying for my ti…ah, I get it. Allright get out of my office.