EVOLUTION, as understood by a Creationist:
A few hundred years ago, deep in the jungle, a girl monkey goes into labor.
Monkey Boyfriend: You can do it, sweetie.
With a loud monkey noise, she gives birth.
Monkey Doctor: It's a new species!
Monkey Boyfriend: We'll call it humans.
An elderly fish enters, pats the chimpanzee on the back.
Fish: I'm proud of you, son.
Monkey Boyfriend: Thanks, dad.
(SIDE NOTE: The monkeys are not married.)
Years later, the human boy is cornered by some predators.
Human boy: Crap. Better evolution-ize.
The boy evolves some laser eyes, or possibly wings. He easily defeats all the predators.