So Me, Myself and I walked into a bar and ordered drinks. Now I didn't want to pay for the tab so I told myself, "This one is on me." It seemed like a good idea at the time but I was totally drunk and had no idea what I had gotten myself into. But the night was young, the liquor was hot, the good times were rolling and besides, nothing really mattered to me as long as I didnt mean anything by it. Why, I couldn't count how many times I punched myself in the nuts just to make me laugh! In fact, I was always the first to say that no one loved me better than I did myself and as long as I was with myself, nothing could make me want anything else!
I sat there pounding back drinks for hours while secretly asking myself if it would really would really be alright for me to pay to bill. Sadly, nothing I said could convince myself otherwise. "Don't fuck with me it'll only end badly." Now like I said before, I really had too much to drink that night, which is probably why I suddenly blurted out "Oh, fuck me! I paid for rounds the last three nights so it's only fair to give me the tab!" I couldn't say what happened next because apparently, I was knocked unconscious and woke up the next morning in the hospital. I looked around and saw myself looking into a mirror while laughing and saying "Fuck me eh? Not a chance in hell!"