Shark Week

Did you hear the one about the appendix? It's a real side-splitter!
-Ryan Manning
I walked in on my parents having sex
You should see my face on the video tape
-Joseph Flowers
Confused Entourage Fan at the Emmys
"How the hell did Kevin Dillon miss out on a best drama nomination again?"
-Jim Awesome
Douchebag? Or Schizophrenic Douchebag?
I think my sick Ed Hardy shirt speaks for itself.
-Conor McKeon
I just got done reading a book about podiatry. The footnotes were incredible.
-Joey Diaferia
Ex-Girlfriends are like assholes…
…I'm sorry, let me rephrase that. Ex-Girlfriends are assholes.
-Adrian Flores
Two Words Guys Hate
Don't and stop. Unless you put them together.
-Miraj N
The Camera Adds Ten Pounds
I find chewing through the lenses to be the toughest part.
-Ryan Manning
I would say that weak ejaculation is my only shortcoming in life.
-Raj Clark